It began with a dream
by ogeemattyb
Summary: Kurt has had a recurring dream. The mystery man in his dream remains faceless though. Who could it be? Eventual Kurtofsky, or as I like to call it, Krave. but this instillation is all Kurt. He doesn't go to Dalton and Blaine is never an option. Quinn-Kurt Friendship, and even one OC.
1. Chapter 1: A dream is a wish

So this story will start after the RHG Episode, and before the Never Been Kissed. Everything that happened before RHG is going to be cannon, but not everything after will be. Some stuff will and some will not. I will have some sing songs that they did and some they didn't. The story is going to be from Kurt's perspective on just about everything and will be clearly labeled if its isn't. This is my first fanfic so I apologize for anything that may go wrong. And I Don't own glee cause if I did, Kurt would be with Dave and not with Blaine, I like Blaine but I crave Kurave….

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><p>Chapter one: A Dream is a Wish…<p>

_I wake up and slowly pull myself out of bed. Groggily walking over to the vanity, I start with my morning skin care regimen. Then a noise coming from the bed pulls my attention, and I see a sleeping form lying there. Thinking nothing of it I return my focus to the mirror in front of me._

_The bed creaks and then there are strong arms surrounding my waist, and a head with short curly hair resting on my back and left shoulder. A kiss is lightly given between my shoulder blades and it sends a quiver down my spine. He moves away and the shower starts up in the connecting bathroom. I finish my routine and head for the closet trying to figure out what I am going to wear. _

_Then the arms are around me again and a firm, toned, bare chest is pressed against my back. Leaning into the embrace I hold his arms and rest my head against his shoulder. _

"_Do you have to go today? I really want you to stay. I'm not ready for our mini vacation to be over." I ask in a somewhat pleading tone._

'_Babe, you know I do. I have to fix that leak in my car, and then run a few errands."_

_With a sigh, "Well then go and do that so you can hurry back, the bed is calling our names."_

_He chuckles and lightly kisses my cheek before moving off to get started on his day._

_Taking on last look around the closet, I walk over to a dresser and pull out a pair of sweat pants and a sweatshirt. Both are too big for me but they smell like him. After I put them on and take a deep breath, breathing in his scent, I walk over to the window and look out on the man of my dreams. He is bent over the engine of his car, a 1995 white Corvette._

My eyes blink open and I am awake. The dream ends there every time, but it is always the same. Sometimes new details are added, like this time. The sweatshirt read **McKinley Athletic Department**.

I look over at the alarm clock, **6:22**. Knowing I won't be able to fall back asleep, I head over to my vanity and look at myself in the mirror. As I start inspecting my face a small smile starts to creep up on me as I think about the dream. After sitting there for ten minutes reliving my fantasy, I go and take a quick shower. Then I start on my morning skin care.

By seven I am upstairs dressed and making a healthy breakfast, an egg white omelet with spinach and some low-fat cheese. With my dishes in the sink, I grab an apple for my lunch and start heading for the door. As I am walking past the stairs my father comes down.

"Morning dad."

"Morning Kurt, have a good day at school."

I toss the apple in the air and catch it deftly with the opposite hand, "I will surely try."

As soon as I get in the car I turn on some music not really paying too much attention to it, but still singing along.

My good mood only lasts the twenty minutes it takes for me to drive to school. The regular football cronies are waiting in the parking lot looking for their next victim in their cruel game of dumpster toss. I wait in my car for about five minutes until I see Jacob Ben Israel being grabbed by two of the Neanderthals, and then I make my mad dash for the doors. As I approach my locker I thank Gaga that I was spared.

The halls are about half full as I grab the books that I need from my locker quickly and head for my first class before anyone can give me a slushy facial. The day passes pretty quickly and before I know it I am in Glee sitting next to Mercedes trying to figure out what crazy assignment Mr. Schue is going to give us today.

The rest of our little group is here sitting in small groups chatting and gossiping about this and that when our teacher finally makes it. "So this week your assignment to come up with a song that it personal to what ever is happening in your life right now. I am giving you some free reign here but it still has to mean something to you." There are some gasps and squeals from around the room, "It does have to be appropriate, and maybe we can find a good number or two, to use at Sectionals. You can pair up or go solo on this one guys so have fun with it!"

All of New Directions it abuzz with excitement for this new assignment because it really is the first time where we get to sing something so personal and with out any real guidelines. Well besides it having to relate to our lives somehow, but that still is wide open for interpretation. Rachel is already talking with Fin about a duet idea she has had for quite some time, Sam and Quinn look like they are going to try and out do them selves from their last duet, and Artie and Mike have their heads together working out some song and dance number. Everyone else is going through their MP3 players and sheet music.

"So what you gonna sing? Something _Fabulous_ I'm sure?"

"I am not sure yet Mercedes, but you know I can't let down my fans." With a wink we are both giggling and I am truly stumped as to what I am going to sing.

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><p>Later that night I find myself in my room done with my homework and nothing much else to do. It is only Monday. So I start to look through my movie collection. My eyes land on Disney's Cinderella and I know that is the one I want to watch. After the movie is over, I know what song I want to sing.<p>

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><p>It's Friday and I am the last one to go. I have worked very hard on my choice because it isn't the kind of song I would usually sing. But it fits with what has been on my mind lately, unfortunately no one knows this because I have yet to tell a soul about my recurring dream.<p>

"Okay Kurt, you are the last one. Do you have a number prepared for us?"

Nodding my head I step up in front of everyone, moving behind the piano, and taking a seat at the keys. Brad knew I was going to do this and quietly moved off to the side. I gently put my hands on the keys and start to play the into closing my eyes and taking a deep breath, I start to sing.

_A dream is a wish your heart makes_

_When you're fast asleep_

_In dreams you lose your heartaches_

_Whatever you wish for, you keep_

_Have faith in you dreams and someday_

_Your rainbow will come smiling through_

_No matter how you heart is grieving _

_If you keep on believing _

_The dream that you wish will come true_

_A dream is a wish your heart makes _

_When you feeling small_

_Alone in the night you whisper_

_Thinking that no one can hear you at all_

_You wake with the morning sunlight_

_To find fortune that is smiling on you_

_Don't let your heart be filled with sorrow_

_For all you know, tomorrow_

_The dream that you wish will come true_

_A dream is a wish your heart makes_

_When you're fast asleep_

_In dreams you will lose your heartaches_

_Whatever you wish for, you keep_

_You wake with the morning sunlight_

_To find fortune that is smiling on you_

_Don't let your heart be filled with sorrow_

_For all you know, tomorrow_

_The dream that you wish will come true_

_No matter how your heart is grieving_

_If you keep on believing_

_The dream that you wish will come true_

I keep my eyes closed as I play the last few notes. The entire song I was picturing my dream guy, and was singing to him. But as soon as my eyes open I see everyone on their feet in applause. And Mr Schue steps forward, "Wow Kurt. I think you just blew us all out of the water. That was Amazing. It could possibly be a great Ballad for Sectionals, what do you guys think?" There are many cheers, and yeas. Even Rachel is a bit taken aback and slowly nods her head. "If you don't mind my asking Kurt, what made you choose that song?"

"Oh just a dream I had…"

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><p>So tell me what you think! Reviews would be Greatly appreciated. I don't have a beta to read this yet so if there is anyone out there who might like to for me I would be honored. I am not sure when I will update, I have an Idea for what will happen, but nothing is set in stone just yet. Mostly I will be writing when inspiration strikes, so hopefully I will be updating a few times a month. So Happy reading and please review!<p> 


	2. Chapter 2: Courage

AN: Some of this chapter was dialogue pulled right out of the episode itself because I really feel like this had to happen. And Don't hate on me because of it. There is going to be lots of angst for some characters. I will say that not everything will be cannon but this moment was to big to just skip over. I also know that this Chapter is much longer than the last one. In fact it is about twice as long. My chapters are all going to vary in length. It all depends on what I need or want to happen in any given 'episode'

Enjoy…

Chapter Two: Courage

So one of the worst days of my life starts with me and Tina walking down the hallway talking about new sweater trends, and the fact that I will be wearing most of them this season when I get pushed against some lockers by that Neanderthal Karofsky. He seems to think that he can push me around and that nothing will come of it. And right now, he is right. No teachers ever see what goes on, and none of the students dare say anything. Then considering he is about twice as big as I am makes it hard for me to stand up against him.

Then after that drama we went to Glee club. Walking in I feel tired and kind of numb, and it isn't from my face meeting the lockers. I am only half paying attention when Mr. Schue is talking about who our competition is going to be. And then there is Santana's crude remark which I am the only one who seems to notice how offensive it is. "And since it got you guys jazzed up about sectionals last year, I thought that this could be our second annual boys vs. girls mashup tournament." I think I am the only one not cheering. "So split up into two groups and, uh, figure out what songs your gonna sing."

As everyone gets up to move I quietly slink over to the girls side hoping that I will get away with it, but not really thinking I will. And I am right. "Kurt gonna say it again, Boys team." I walk back over to the 'boys side' and sit in silence because I know when it comes down to it, with the boys my opinion is not really wanted. Sitting there listening to them talk about some ACDC something or another makes me zone out again, thinking about how I wish there was more acceptance in this hole of a town.

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><p>Here I am walking down the hallway, and another locker slam. Something inside me snaps, "WHAT is your problem?"<p>

Karofsky starts walking toward me, "You talking back to me?" It's then I realize that I actually said something and I am probably gonna get hit worse than a locker slam. "You want a piece of the Fury?"

"The Fury?"

"That's what I named my fist."

All of a sudden I am less afraid and more angry, must be testosterone or adrenaline, "Well with that level of creativity you could easily be come an assistant manager at a rendering plant."

"I don't know what that is, but if I find out its bad, the Fury is going to find _you._" and he slams me against the locker for the third time that day. Only a few seconds too late Mr. Schue walks around the corner and asks me to come to his office.

"Is there anything that I can do?" I accept the water he offers, sigh and say, "No, this is my hill to climb alone."

"Can I be honest? I think it's getting to you. Usually this stuff just rolls right off your back, but lately you've been belligerent, angry, pushing people away."

I sigh mentally, does he not see that I am only acting this way because of the way I am being treated? "Can I be honest with you? You like everyone else at this school are too quick to let homophobia slide. And your lesson plans are boring and repetitive. Boys Vs. Girls? That doesn't challenge any of us."

"You mean because I didn't let you join the girls like you wanted?"

I sigh again, "To answer your question, yes I am unhappy. And yes being the only out gay kid at this school gets me down, but most of all, I don't feel challenged in the least here." I walk out as the bell rings and try to hold my head high for the rest of the day. I can't let the bullies here think that they are getting to me, so I put on my mask of indifference and continue on.

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><p>In glee club the next day I am so excited to hear that the guys will be doing songs traditionally sung by girls and vice a versa. In my free period I make up a few boards for samples and I think that the guys will be very impressed with the knowledge I have to offer. I couldn't have been more wrong. After Puck's comment, about doing something useful, I feel like I just can't win. So I give in. "Fine." I take down my sample boards and head out of the class room we were using for our meeting.<p>

I walk out into the hallway and stuff the boards I worked hard on in the trashcan. The halls are pretty empty because it is lunch time so I go out to my car and get it. If all I can do is spy then a spy I will become. Who knows, maybe I can find a place where I don't have to put up with such blatant Homophobia.

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><p>At first I am nervous because I didn't realize that they would have uniforms, but luckily not many people pay too much attention to me. When I start walking down the giant staircase I notice that all the students are heading in the same direction. So I stop one of the people passing me. "Excuse me. Um, hi. Can I ask you a question? I'm new here."<p>

"My name's Blaine." He holds out his hand to shake mine and I grab it, "Kurt. So, what exactly is going on?"

"The Warblers. Every now and then they throw an impromptu performance in the senior commons. It tends to shut the school down for a little while."

"So, wait, the glee club is kind of cool?"

"The Warblers are like rock stars. Come on. I know a shortcut." He grabs my hand in his and we are running down a hallway and it is one of the best feelings in the world. I don't really know this, Blaine, but he had no problem touching or even coming near me like all the other guys in McKinley to. It is quite the rush.

He leads me into a room full of people. Some are standing around in obvious anticipation, while others are moving things around to create a space for the Warblers to perform in. "Oh, I stick out like a sore thumb." The statement is true. I am used to that feeling but not only don't my clothes match the uniforms, but there is still that feeling like I don't quite belong.

"Well next time don't forget your jacket new kid. You'll fit right in." Some of the boys in the room start to do some sort of A cappella. "Now if you'll excuse me."

_Before you met me_

_I was all right _

_But things were kind of heavy_

_You brought me to life_

_Now every February_

_you'll be my Valentine, Valentine_

_Let's go all the way tonight_

_No regrets, just love_

_We can dance until we die, you and I_

_Will be young forever_

_You make me _

_Feel like I'm living a _

_Teenage dream_

_The way you turn me on_

_I can't sleep_

_Let's run away _

_And don't ever look back_

_Don't ever look back_

_Let's go all the way tonight_

_No regrets, just love_

_We can dance until we die_

_You and I, will be young forever_

_You make me_

_Feel like I'm living a_

_Teenage dream_

_The way you turn me on_

_I can't sleep_

_Let's run away _

_And don't ever look back_

_Don't ever look back_

_I'm gonna get your heart racing_

_In my skin-tight jeans_

_Be your teenage dream tonight_

_Ooh, ah…_

_Ooh…_

_Ah…_

_Ah, ah_

_Yeah…!_

_You make me_

_Feel like I'm living a_

_Teenage dream_

_The way you turn me on_

_I can't sleep_

_Let's run away and don't ever look back_

_Don't ever look back_

_My heart stops when you look at me_

_Just one touch, now, baby I believe_

_This is real_

_So take a chance_

_And don't ever look back_

_Don't ever look back_

_I'm gonna get your heart racing _

_In my skin-tight jeans_

_Be your teenage dream tonight_

_Let you put your hands on me_

_In my skin-tight jeans_

_Be your teenage dream tonight_

And every one claps and cheers enthusiastically. It is very apparent that it is totally genuine and that every one really liked the performance. The Warblers are popular.

Then Blaine comes up to me after the crowd starts to disperse a little and asks if I would like to talk and get a coffee. So when two other members of the Warblers sit down I think the worst.

"Latte?"

"Thank you"

"This is Wes and David."

"It's very civilized for you to invite me for coffee before you beat me up for spying."

David responds, "We are not going to beat you up."

Wes chimes in, "You were such a terrible spy, we thought it was sort of… endearing."

"Which made me think that spying on us wasn't really the reason you came."

I smile and stutter, but then my curiosity gets the best of me, "Can I ask you guys a question? Are you guys all… gay?"

All three of them laugh and I instantly feel the fool. "Uh no. I mean I am," and Blaine points to himself, "but these two have girlfriends."

Wes continues, "This is not a gay school. We just have a zero tolerance harassment policy."

"Everybody gets treated the same, no matter who they are. Its pretty simple." David finishes.

I am completely stunned into silence. It is mind shattering that there is a place out there that doesn't condone or allow bulling of any kind to happen. I know that once I get to New York things will be different, but the fact that there is a high school out there that is like that, well there aren't any words.

Blaine stares at me for a moment before asking his friends to leave so he and I could talk alone. I take a few deep breaths and keep my hands on the coffee cup. It heat is the only thing that I can feel right now. I know Blaine is about to talk to me but I feel like I can barely focus and there are tears welling in my eyes that I am trying so hard to keep from falling.

"I take it you are having trouble at school."

Collecting myself as best I can, "I am the only person out of the closet at my school. And I-I… I tried to stay strong about it, but… there's this Neanderthal who's made it his mission to make my life a living hell. And nobody seems to notice." I think one or two tears start to fall but I can't stop them. This is really the first time that someone has asked me what is going on. Mr. Schue tried in is weird little way, but even then he turned the conversation around to talk about glee club and not what is going on in the hallways.

"I know how you feel. I got taunted at my old school, and it really… pissed me off. I even complained about it to the faculty, and they were sympathetic and all, but you could just tell that… nobody really cared. It was, like, 'hey if you're gay, your life's just gonna be miserable. Sorry. Nothing we can do about it.' So I left, and I came here. Simple as that. So you have two options. I mean, I'd love to tell you to just come and enroll here, but tuition at Dalton's sort of steep, and I know that's not an option for everybody. Or… you can refuse to be the victim. Prejudice is just ignorance, Kurt, and you have a chance right now to teach him."

"How?" Teach this low-brow Neanderthal to accept me, seems easier said than done. But then most things are.

"Confront him. Call him out. I ran… Kurt. I didn't stand up. I let bullies chase me away, and it is something that I really… really regret."

Confront him? I tried that once didn't I? And if I remember right it didn't go too well. But he is right. I am not going to let some ignorant idiot run me out of my school and away from my friends. I give him a short nod and we exchange numbers, saying that if I should ever feel the need to talk to someone who knows what I am going through to feel free to call or text.

I leave Dalton with something that I didn't have when I got there. Well two things, a new friends and courage. I can do this… I think…

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><p>I have to admit that when the girls start their mash-up, I wish I could be up there with them. They are, well rockin' it out. Then I feel my phone vibrate, 'Courage.' -from Blaine. That puts a bigger smile on my face and I know that I will be able to stand up to Karofsky the next time he tries anything.<p>

Little did I know that my chance to do so was right after I walked out into the hallway. I was looking at the text Blaine sent. I really needed the word to ring true and stay with me. Then next thing I know my phone is ripped out of my hand and I am slammed against the lockers by Karofsky who just has an impartial yet smug look on his face. It takes me a few seconds to gather my dignity and courage, the thing I was hoping to have enough of. Before I set a determined face and start after him shouting at him down the hallway.

He ignores me but I watch him enter the locker room and as soon as I bang the door open I am yelling again. "I am talking to you!"

'The Girl's locker room is next door."

"What is your problem?"

"Excuse me?"

"What are you so scared of?"

"Besides you sneaking in here to peek at my junk?"

"Oh, yeah, every straight guys nightmare that all of us gays are secretly out to molest and convert you. Well, guess what, ham hock? You're not my type!"

"That right?"

"Yes, I don't dig on chubby boys who sweat too much and are going to be bald by the time they're thirty."

"Do not, Push me Hummel."

And it is then that I realize I am not going to come out of this unscathed, so I continue. "You going to hit me? Do it."

"Don't push me!"

"Hit me, 'cause it's not going to change who I am. You can't punch the gay out of me any more than I can punch the ignoramus out of you!"

"I said get out of my face!"

"You are nothing but a scared little boy who can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are!"

And then he is Kissing me. His hands are on my neck holding me there. The kiss is rough, full of want and need. Desperation. His eyes are closed, but mine are wide open. I can only stare at him while he assaults my mouth, and when he finally pulls away I can finally breath. But then he starts to lean back in for another kiss and I just put my hands to his chest and push him away from me and take a few steps back. My hand goes to cover my mouth, my body is frozen, and my mind numb.

He stares at me for a few seconds before becoming emotional, tears about to stream down his face. But instead he slams the lockers with his hands and rushes past me to leave the room. Leaving me alone. And all I can think of it that David Karofsky stole my first kiss from me.

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><p>It takes everything I have not to break down here. I quickly and quietly slip out of the locker room and go straight to the nurse's office where I say I am sick and need to go home. I must look pale or really sick because she gives me a permission slip and I take a few things from my locker then head out to my car. I sit for a minute before the tears start to pour out of me.<p>

The drive home is blurry and I don't remember half of it. I head to my room and curl up on my bed where my light sobs turn into full body shaking gasps. I think I stop breathing at one point but the next few hours pass in a haze. I hear my father come home and when he starts to come down the stairs to see where I'm at, I fake that I am asleep. There is no way I can tell him what happened. I can't tell anyone. So I lie there and pretend to be asleep so he will go back upstairs.

At nine I call Blaine and start to tell him what happened. It doesn't take long before I can feel the tears starting again but I refuse to break down while on the phone with my new friend. He says that he will be at McKinley for lunch time so he and I can confront Karofsky together. We say our goodbyes and I put my phone on its stand to charge. My father is heading to bed so I sneak upstairs and go to the spare room that still holds all of my mother's things, including her old dresser. I open the all the drawers and lay down in front of it breathing in her scent, wishing her arms could hold me again. Wishing she was here right now so I have someone to tell what is going on in my life. I love my father very dearly, but my mother was always so much better with these things.

Her scent soothes me and calms me down and it isn't long before I fall asleep.

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><p>In Glee the next day Mr. Schue starts going off on all of us about how disappointed he is in us. Something about Coach Beiste quitting and it being our fault? Mercedes and I exchange a questioning glance at each other not quite understanding what is going on. And then they guys explain what is going on but I could really care less. Then Principal Figgins comes in and asks to see Puck and Mr. Schue in his office, and the rest of us are left to go our own way. I don't say anything to anyone, even in class. I keep my head down and wait for lunch. Right as everyone is getting let out, I meet up with Blaine in the parking lot and we walk in trying to find Karofsky where ever he may be. When we finally do see him it on the stairs by the outdoor commons.<p>

Blaine walks up to him, "Excuse me?'

"Hey, lady boys. This your boyfriend Kurt?"

Blaine doesn't let me say anything, and that is good cause I am kind of nervous. "Kurt and I would like to talk to you about something."

"I gotta go to class."

"Kurt told me what you did."

"Oh yeah, what's that?"

Not able to stand in silence anymore, "You kissed me."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"It seems like you might be a little confused, and that's totally normal." He looks like he may be open to talking. Which is good. If he is struggling I would be more than willing to help him out. "This is a… a very hard thing to come to terms with, and you should just know that you're not alone."

He stops on the stairs and turns around to look up at us. "I… I still have no clue what you are talking about."

And he turns and practically runs away leaving me and Blaine standing on the stairs looking at his retreating form.

"Well I don't think he is coming out anytime soon." I sigh and slowly sit down on the stairs. "What's going on?" Blaine walks over and takes a seat next to me. "Why are you so upset?"

I take one more deep breath before admitting it out loud. "Because up until yesterday, I had never been kissed. Or at least… one that counted."

"Come on, I'll buy you lunch." I get up and follow him. Thinking how is lunch gonna make me feel better? But I can see that Blaine cares so I will indulge him. And who knows maybe it will make me feel better. Maybe I can figure something out.

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><p>The next day I am standing at my locker looking at the word courage which I tapped up with different cutout letters from magazines when I get slammed into the locker again. I turn and start to fall to the floor as I watch Karofsky walk away with some of his football buddies. I made my stand and I failed. He isn't going to back down. But now I know why he is doing this to me. He is gay and is just too afraid to be himself, so instead he is going to bully me because I am brave enough to be myself no matter the cost. I am going to have patience now. I think I can get through to him. I just hope he isn't as much of a Neanderthal as I believe he is pretending to be. There may be hope for him yet…<p>

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><p>Hope you guys liked it! Reviews are like candy for the soul! Thanks again for reading! And if you guys have any suggestions or questions feel free to tell me. I may or may not add your ideas (it is my story after all) but sometimes someone else's perspective on things is interesting and it also gives me inspiration. And I will try to answer any and all questions that you guys may or may not have!<p> 


	3. Chapter 3: Bound4Broadway

I Do not own Glee, if I did, things would be done very differently!

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><p>Chapter 3: Bound4Broadway<p>

After dealing with the all the bullying of the last few weeks, talking with Blaine and hanging out with him has been really good for me. I know that I have been neglecting Mercedes, but Blaine knows what I am going through cause he has been through it too. Plus the fact that he also happens to be gay it a big plus. Now don't get me wrong, I love my girl Merc. But having another guy to talk to about this stuff has been really helpful. There really aren't a ton of role models for guys my age. I mean there are some, but a lot of the 'stars' and television characters that are gay are really just a bunch of stereotypes. I know that I fit into a few of them, but I am still a guy, not a girl. And having Blaine treat me like a guy and not an honorary girl is really nice.

So after postponing our bowling night, and getting Miss Holiday to sub for us in glee, where she performed and amazing rendition of 'Forget You', I find my self at Taco Bell with the rest of the glee club where we are all having fun thinking of songs that we can sing at sectionals. When we get back to school for the last period of the day I am shoved into the locker again by none other than Karofsky. He lingers a little and then turns and heads for the boys bathroom.

Collecting myself, and putting on one of my many indifferent masks, I slowly follow. When I get in Karofsky is scaring some freshman out.

After the poor kid leaves, and making sure there is no one else in here, I lock the door, and then I turn to face my bully. "So pushing me around isn't enough is it? You have to go and yell at innocent bystanders."

"What ever Homo." he turns to the sink to wash his hands, but the look on his face tells me that he is uncomfortable and maybe even a little scared.

"You know you don't have to get violent. Even if you aren't ready to accept yourself doesn't mean that you have to go and take it out on everyone else."

"What would you know about it?"

"I know plenty. I know that it is hard to tell others. I was being picked on for being gay before I even knew what it meant. I deal with it everyday and I have never once lashed out on someone else because of my own personal problems. I find that talking about them to some one else helps immensely."

"Yeah well I am not telling anyone, and you better not either." His voice rises at the end of the statement that turned into a command.

"I won't tell anyone. I think that you should do that at your own pace. But I do believe that you should talk to someone. There are hotlines and chat rooms. They are completely anonymous, and you can start to get the help you need. If you won't talk to me, at least talk to someone."

"Like I said," he takes a few steps closer to me, "I am not telling anyone, and you better not. Not if you know what's good for you."

He pushes against my shoulder and makes me turn sideways in order to keep my balance, and goes to the door and unlocks it, slipping out into the still crowded hallway. He has to come around eventually…

* * *

><p>That afternoon when I get home, I decide to take some of my own advice. Talking to Blaine has been great and I want to keep his friendship, but I also don't want every time we hang out to be me complaining about everything that goes on at school. So I go to check out some of those chat rooms I was talking about. Who knows, maybe I will be able to find someone who can give me another point of view on the situation.<p>

After searching for a fifteen minutes I finally find one that looks promising. It has different chat rooms for all fifty states and a few other countries. I could find someone out of state to talk to, and I move the mouse over New York. But then I think, are there other gay kids in Ohio? I mean of course there are. But I could talk to someone who is going through the same stuff, at the same time I am.

After taking time to make a small profile, but not filling in too many details, I have to pick a screen name. I am not really sure what to pick. There are so many things I could say with this. As I look around my room for inspiration my eyes land on some of my original Broadway posters. Turning back to the screen I type in: Bound4Broadway.

When I enter the chat room there aren't very many people in there. And before I even have a chance to type anything all but one person left, Guest64. Taking a deep breath I type the first thing that comes to mind…

Bound4Broadway: Hey.

Lame I know, but surprising enough I get a response fairly quickly.

Guest64: Hey, how's it goin?

Bound4Broadway: Not bad. How are you?

Guest64: I've been better.

Bound4Broadway: Really? What's up?

Guest64: I am not sure that I am ready to talk about it…

Bound4Broadway: That's ok. Why don't we start with something easier. Are you really from Ohio?

Guest64: Yeah, u?

Bound4Broadway: Yes, born and raised.

Guest64: Me 2.

Bound4Broadway: So what kind of stuff do you like to do? Movies, sports, music?

Guest64: Well I really like older movies, like Casablanca, Singing in the Rain, and Gone with the Wind. But most people who know me would just assume that I like violent action movies, no one has bothered to ask.

Guest64: I listen to all kinds of music, but I love crooner music. Anything like Frank Sinatra or Michael Buble. But again most people who know me would probably assume that I am all about country music, or some kind of rock.

Guest64: As for sports, well I like them.

Bound4Broadway: But…?

Guest64: But nothing, I like them and I play them. They aren't all that define me.

Bound4Broadway: I never said they did. But maybe others do?

Guest64: Sometimes. I play for my school, and everyone sees me as the Jock, but I am more than that. It's just no one chooses to see that. I get mostly A's and B's, I like to read, and sometimes I even write. But no one knows.

Guest64: I admit that I hide some of it. I am not out. And sometimes its just too easy to use the 'Jock' as a barrier to hide everything that could potentially make me seem less, well less straight.

Bound4Broadway: Ok, so are you comfortable with who you are. When you look in the mirror are you okay with who you see?

There is a long pause. I almost think that he has left, but Guest64 is still signed in. I am about to say something when I finally get a response.

Guest64: Before, yes. Now….

Bound4Broadway: Well then you have a chance to change that. You are the only person who gets to decide who you are. If you choose to change, you will. I know it won't be easy, hell, its going to be hard. But if you are willing to you can.

Guest64: Maybe. I'm just not sure that I am ready.

Bound4Broadway: You just have to go at your own speed. Take your time. Until then if you like we can continue to talk.

Guest64: I think I would like that. But I do have some obligations so when can we talk next?

Bound4Broadway: I also have some after school activities, How about Wednesdays. I am usually free after 4:30.

Guest64: Works for me.

The door upstairs opens and I hear my dad calling for me.

Bound4Broadway: Well, I would love to stay and chat some more, but I hear my dad calling, so I will talk to you on Wednesday.

Guest64: kk

Guest 64: Thanks

Bound4Broadway: Anytime. J

* * *

><p>So I am not sure what to expect from this glee gathering in the auditorium. Neither Rachel or Miss Holiday are here yet and no one has any clue what is going on. How I found myself in between Quinn and Finn I will never know. But Finn and I have not talked too much since the whole Lady Gaga thing. I know that we are friends (kindof) and that our parents are dating but there really isn't a whole lot of conversation there.<p>

But surprisingly Quinn and I have been talking for a little while now. After a short lull in the conversation…

"Kurt, are you okay?"

I am a little taken aback by this. Someone has actually noticed that things are not perfect, even though I try to act as though nothing is bothering me.

"I am fine Quinn, why do you ask?"

"Well for one, you can't bullshit a bullshiter, and two, you haven't been quite your self for the last few weeks."

I try to come up with something to say, but I am lost for words. Not even my best friends noticed that something was wrong. But here is Quinn, runner up to my ice queen act, looking at me all knowingly.

"Its okay if you don't want to talk here, but stay back with me after whatever Rachel is going to do. I think its time you and I had a chat."

With the look she gives me I know that she wants to help, and that I will not be escaping this conversation. Its going to happen whether I like it or not.

* * *

><p>So after an amazing performance from Rachel and Miss Holiday I find my self up on stage with Quinn trying to avoid eye contact.<p>

"So Kurt, what is going on with you? Has Finn been harassing you again? I thought you guys were over that?"

"Its not Finn."

"Then who is it. I know that someone has been doing something. Is it that kid from Dalton?"

"No, Blaine has been wonderful actually."

"So are you guys together?"

"What! No!"

"Sorry, I just thought-"

"Thought what? That Kurt finally found a gay boy and is going to instantly hook up with him?"

"That isn't what I meant. Look I know that we have never really talked and you have no reason to trust me, but Kurt, I can see the pain that you are hiding. I know that something happened to you and that you are holding inside. I know because last year I did the same thing. I didn't handle that situation the right way, I hurt people I cared about and I paid the price for it. I didn't have a whole lot of people to turn to and I know what it feels like to keep a secret locked away. And in the end, it only brings hurt. Mostly to you but also to the ones who care about you. So if you don't want to tell me, then tell Mercedes, or your dad. Just talk to someone."

Its funny. Yesterday I gave the same speech to David. And here is Quinn giving it to me. I know that I can't tell her everything, but I do need to tell more people. Only Blaine knows. But he isn't here all the time.

She starts to walk away, but I run up to her and grab her arm to stop her and turn her around.

"Someone kissed me."

"What! Who?"

"I can't tell you, its not my secret to share."

"Kurt?"

"I'm ok, or at least I will be."

"Why are you so shaken by all of this?"

"Because… he stole my first kiss. The first kiss that really mattered."

Before I know it Quinn envelops me in a hug. She doesn't say anything, she just holds me as the silent tears start to fall from my eyes. This is what I needed, what Blaine wasn't able to give me. Silent assurance. Assurance that everything would be okay, and that even though my first kiss was with some one too scared to be himself, I would be able to move on and possible find someone to give me a proper kiss.

We stand there for about five minutes before I move to pull away. I quickly hide my face in my hands and wipe the tears away. She grabs my chin and pulls it up and gets the ones I missed.

"Better?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"So do I have to kick someone's ass or are you going to be okay?"

"I will be good, I really needed that."

"Okay, well from now on when something happens just know that you can come to me if you need to."

"I will." She starts to turn away again "And Quinn, I am sorry that no one was there for you."

"I got the help I needed eventually. I was a spoiled brat and I acted like it. But this year is a new start for me. And contrary to popular belief I really like being in Glee club."

"Well if you need someone to talk to, you can come to me as well."

She smiles and walks out the door leaving me on the stage alone. But for the first time in a while, I don't feel completely alone, but at the same time…

_Talking to myself and feeling old_

_Sometimes I'd like to quit_

_Nothing ever seems to fit_

_Hanging around_

_Nothing to do but frown_

_Rainy days and Mondays always get me down_

_What I've got they used to call the blues_

_Nothing is really wrong_

_Feeling like I don't belong_

_Walking around_

_Some kind of lonely clown_

_Rainy days and Mondays always get me down_

_Funny but it seems that I always wind up here with you_

_Nice to know somebody loves me_

_Funny but it seems that it's the only thing to do_

_Run and find the one who loves me_

_What I feel has come and gone before_

_No need to talk it out_

_We know what its all about_

_Hanging around_

_Nothing to do but frown_

_Rainy days and Mondays always get me down_

_Funny but it seems that it's the only thing to do_

_Run and find the one who loves me_

_What I feel has come and gone before_

_No need to talk it out_

_We know what it's all about_

_Hanging around_

_Nothing to do but frown_

_Rainy days and Mondays always get me down_

_Hanging around _

_Nothing to do but frown_

_Rainy days and Mondays always get me down_

* * *

><p>Song- Rainy Days and Mondays by Emmy Rossum<p>

AN: So here is another Chapter. As per my notes before, I like to change a few things. I have been thinking for a while that I like Quinn and that she and Kurt would be good friends. I have read a few fics where they are friends and I like just about all of them. I think that they can relate to each other on a different level. Also as of late, I am liking Blaine a whole lot less than I did when he first came on the show. I would like to keep a Klaine friendship but I am debating it. Thoughts? And as for the song choice, well I LOVE Emmy and this song is amazing, I highly recommend listening to everything she has on her album! You will probably be seeing more of her work later on. Also I am trying to think a head a little bit, Kurt is going to get a solo at sectionals, the only thing is I have no idea what I want to have him sing. I need suggestions! And Please Review! I really have no idea how I am doing with this and all comments and criticisms are very much appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4: Old, New, Borrowed, and Blue

Chapter 4: Old, New, Borrowed, and Blue

It has been a few weeks since my talk with Quinn. True to my word, I have been talking with Guest64 every Wednesday. Mostly we talk about books, movies, and music. He seems a little reluctant to really share anything more about himself. I think he is nervous to talk to anyone about the side of himself that he keeps hidden, but I have told him about me when he asks, otherwise we keep the subjects light.

But I think the biggest surprise is that Karofsky has been a relatively, dare I say it, nice person. Now don't get me wrong. He hasn't turned over a new leave over night, but he hasn't really bothered anyone. In fact, he has been rather quite. Which is a bit odd. Usually you can find him bullying at least one person. But lately, so far as I have seen and heard, he hasn't bothered anyone. I am not the only one to notice this either. All of the glee club is talking about it. Mostly because he hasn't bothered me at all. We actually haven't spoken since that day in the bathroom, the day I started talking to guest64. But Azimio has stepped up in Dave's absence. He has really taken up where David left off,

Quinn and I have been talking more though. I feel like she really gets what is going on in my head right now. She really wants me to tell her who kissed me, but I am remaining true to my promise to Dave.

The only other thing that has happened in the last couple of weeks is that I have had my recurring dream a few more times. Six times to be exact, and every time I get a few more small details. The picture is coming in clearer, but His face still remains a mystery. I still haven't told anyone about it. I feel like it is a secret, and if I tell someone then I will stop having it. But at the same time all I wanna do is tell someone.

And then my thoughts are interrupted by my dad and Carol who both look positively excited. They refuse to tell me what is going on until we find Finn.

* * *

><p>I can't believe that my father is getting married. I am so happy for both of them. My dad hasn't been this happy in a long time. I miss my mother dearly, but I know that dad has been lonely. And Carol is good for him. At first I only set them up to get closer to Finn, and that backfired on me. But the fact that Carol and my dad found happiness is more than I could have hoped for. I have so much planning to do. Not only am I going to oversee all the details of the wedding, but I am also going to be picking the set list that New Directions will be performing. I have to make sure that everyone gets some time to eat and have fun so I have some duets and solos already planned out, but I also want to let the glee clubbers to petition songs that they might like to sing. I of course will have full veto power if I think a song is not appropriate or just shouldn't be sung.<p>

Much of this is running through my head when Quinn appears. "Do you have a minute? I really need to talk." The look on her face tells me that it is important so I close my locker and grab her hand leading her off to an empty classroom.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes…, No…, I'm not sure?"

"What happened?"

"Well, Sam tried to give a promise ring. We haven't even been dating, not really, and he said that he wants to marry me eventually. I mean that's crazy right? We have really only known each other for six weeks, and he wants to get married? What was he thinking. I mean who does that?"

"Wow…"

"I know right!"

"So, what did you say to him?"

"Well first I kinda had a small freak out with him and when he showed me the ring I closed the box and pushed it back in his hand and said that I would have to think about it. We don't really know each other yet. We have gone out a few times, but I didn't think we were that serious."

"Does he know how you feel? Did you tell him?"

"Yes, I told him. I mean it is a little crazy right?"

"In some ways yes, and in others no. Sam knows that he wants to be with you and so he is trying do just that. There are people who get married after a shorter amount of time than what you have known each other. I think that he must really care about you. Maybe it isn't the right time to be engaged but a promise ring can mean more than that he wants to marry you eventually. It can be a promise to respect you and to be faithful to you. I don't think this is something that he did on a whim. He had to have really thought about it."

"Maybe, but still… I am not sure that I am ready for such a commitment. Plus I want to know that he doesn't just want to be with me because of the popularity factor. I am so over that now. I don't even remember why I thought I needed the cheerios anymore."

"I believe that you need to think about how you feel towards Sam and where you see your relationship going with him. If he wants to be this serious you can't keep him hanging. As for the cheerios, well, you can be a spy for us instead of Sue."

"I suppose, but I think I might just quit all together. It really isn't any fun, never really was."

"You know that I will be your friend no matter what happens. If it weren't for you I would still feel like I am floundering."

"No problem, us outcasts have to stick together."

I loop my arm with hers and we walk out of the classroom and head for our next class. For the last few weeks the students of McKinley have noticed how close Quinn and I have been getting and some of the bulling has calmed down for me but it has also picked up a little for her. If she quits the cheerios it will get a lot worse. I just hope she makes the right decisions for her.

* * *

><p>At lunch I stop in to Mr. Schue's office.<p>

"Mr. Schue?"

"Oh, hello Kurt. Come in. How can I help you?"

I take a seat across from him, "So I just found out this morning that my father and Finn's mother are getting married."

"Oh, that's wonderful!"

"Yes it is. I am planning the wedding and the reception, and well I was wondering if it would be ok if the New Directions would do the music. I think it would be perfect. My father wants a good band, and I figured who better than us."

"Well I don't see a problem with it. It will be good practice for you guys. All we have to do is make sure that everyone is on board."

"All ready done. I have talked with everyone about it already and they are happy to do it."

"Okay then. I suppose we will be rehearsing songs for the wedding then!"

"Thank you Mr. Schue. I appreciate your enthusiasm!" I stand and hold my hand out and shake his, then walk out to the hallway and my mind is instantly back to planning."

* * *

><p>It's the next day in Glee club that Sam, Mike, and Artie decided to take a stand against Azimio. Sam has a black eye, and Mike and Artie look pretty shaken up, but they are being tended to by their girlfriends. Then Mr. Schue walks in. "What happened guys? What happened to Sam's eye?"<p>

"He stood up to Azimio." Quinn said, and Tina continued, "All the guys did. Well, not Finn."

"Is everyone okay? Do we all need to go talk to Principal Sylvester?"

"No," Sam says quickly. "I got in a few good licks, too, so we can just call it even. And maybe this will send a warning to Azimio, telling him to back off Kurt."

The whole thing has me shaken a little bit. Mostly because the rest of the club has noticed how bad the bullying has gotten. And they all stepped up to try and help me. I am feeling both happy and sad at the same time. And then Mr. Schue comes over, "You Okay Kurt?"

All I can do is shake my head yes. I have so many mixed emotions right now, and now isn't a good time to let them all come out. So when Mr Schue says that it is time to rehearse for the wedding I am relieved. I can loose myself in the music and dancing and hopefully get myself out of this funk.

* * *

><p>After practice, Quinn loops her arm with mine and leads me to the auditorium. She doesn't say anything and neither do I. She takes me up onstage and turns to face me.<p>

"I know that you have been going through some heavy stuff, and all of that with the guys was meant to help. I am not sure if it will but you know that we all got your back."

"So was it you who told them that I was holding it all in?"

"It might have been," I give her one of my famous Ice Queen glares, "Some one had to Kurt. You shouldn't have to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders. It wasn't my idea to have the guys go after Azimio, that was Rachel's 'brilliance,' but I can't say that I wasn't in favor of the idea. You need help and you are too suborn to ask for it. So we did our best."

My glare softens as she continues speaking. Mostly because I know that she is telling the truth. Quinn is the only one who can see through my barriers, she really has become my best friend.

"So I know that things aren't okay, but you know that we are all hear for you. Have you been talking with someone like I told you to?"

"Yes, actually I have."

"Really? Who?"

"I met him online. In a chat room."

"Kurt I-"

"I haven't told him who I am or anything that is super personal. I am not so stupid to think that he isn't a cyber stalker. We talk every Wednesday and it is mostly about random things. But it is helping. To have another gay kid out there somewhere who can relate to me. He won't talk much about himself, but I think that we are getting there. I promise to be safe."

"Okay. Just don't give me a reason to be worried about you."

"I will do my best," with that I give her a salute.

"Now before we leave I want you to do one more thing for me."

"Oh, and what is that?"

"Scream."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I want you to scream."

"Isn't that a bit undignified?"

"Yes, but it is a great way to release pent up emotion. It is something I learned last year. And believe me, it really works."

"I don-"

"I don't care if you don't want to. You have to do it. Like this," She turns to the empty seats of the auditorium and starts screaming at the top of her lungs.

"See, not so hard." I give her a look that reads 'do I have to?' and she nods her head.

I turn to the empty seats and give a short scream.

She sighs, "Okay now louder, and longer. Trust me. It really does help."

I roll my eyes take a deep breath and scream with everything I have. I scream till I am red in the face and short of breath. And then I scream some more. I am not sure if it lasted five minutes or five seconds, but after I am done I feel immeasurably better.

"Good. Now anytime that things get too stressful or out of hand, just go somewhere where you can be alone and have a good scream. If you have an audience it tends to make you look crazy."

I turn back to her and hug her tight. "Thanks Q."

"Anytime."

* * *

><p>It's Wednesday and I I have so many things to do before the wedding on Saturday. I look at the time and realize I am suppose to get on and chat with guest64.<p>

I log on and see that he is already waiting for me.

Bound4Broadway: Hey, how are you doing today?

Guest64: not bad and u?

Bound4Broadway: I am actually really busy right now.

Guest64: Really with what?

Bound4Broadway: Well, my father is getting married on Saturday and I am kind of planning the wedding. So I have been going to school and not really paying attention in classes because all I can think about is the wedding.

Guest64: Oh really.

Bound4Broadway: yeah, so I was wondering if we might be able to reschedule our chat for maybe Sunday?

Guest64: I think I could do that.

Bound4Broadway: Thank you! I just have so much more to do. And so many things bouncing around in my head.

Guest64: lol its cool dude. Just take a chill pill and relax. You will have to tell me how everything works out. K

Bound4Broadway: Okay. Thank you so much for letting me reschedule. I really have liked talking to you.

Guest64: Ditto. So go on and plan away.

Bound4Broadway: I will and thanks again.

I log off and get back to the book that has all of my ideas in it going over anything that I can think of.

* * *

><p>At first Dad wanted their first dance song to be Sway by Pablo Beltran. But after I got to thinking about it I felt that it wasn't quite the right song. I kept looking through some older albums of his and I came across an Etta James album single, At Last. Not having heard it in a while, I took it into the room that has my mothers old dresser in it and I put the record on and open all the drawers. She spilled one of her perfume bottles in it and it has forever smelled like her. I don't come in her often, just when I need to be close to her. As I listen to the lyrics, I realize that it is a perfect song for them to have their first dance. And as much as I want to be the one to sing it I know that Santana will knock this one out. And as the song says, 'And then the spell was cast.'<p>

And true to my words Santana does Knock it out.

_At last._

_My love has come along_

_My lonely days are over _

_And life is like a song_

_Oh yeah yeah, at last_

_The skies above are blue_

_My heart was wrapped up in clover_

_The night I looked at you_

_And I found a dream that I could speak to_

_A dream that I can call my own_

_I found a thrill to press my cheek to_

_A thrill I have never known_

_Oh yeah yeah, and you smile, you smile_

_Oh, and then the spell was cast_

_And here we are in Heaven_

_For you are mine, at last_

While Santana sings, Carol and my father dance slowly and closely. Everyone can see them whispering to each other and its at the end of the song that I notice Carol is crying. That is when I know that I chose right and everything else tonight will go off perfectly. That is until Finn gets up to give his speech and doesn't say any of the things I wrote for him to say. Instead he starts with talking to Carol, and then proceeds to talk to me. And Now he is singing a song which I know goes for both me and her. But it is so strange. I have not had some one sing to me before. He holds out is hand to dance with me and I am just so stunned I reach out and go with him.

The whole thing was pretty amazing. I know that everyone in glee is family even if we are completely dysfunctional. But in this moment I have never felt more at peace with everything that is going on. Everything is just as it should be.

* * *

><p>As the wedding is winding down, I find myself once again being dragged off by Quinn. "Where are we going?"<p>

"Just outside. I need some fresh air."

"Okay and I had to come with you why?"

"Because I think I know what I am going to do about Sam."

"Oh, and what is that." I open the doors to go out to the parking lot and lead us over to a bench so we can sit down.

"I am going to say no to the ring."

"Really?"

"Yes, I have thought about it and if he and I are going to work, we have to take it slow. With Finn I rushed things and things got messy because of it. I think I really like Sam, but I am not sure that I am ready for the kind of commitment that he wants for us."

"Okay then. So you are going to tell him that?"

"Yes, on Monday. I want us to get to know each other first."

"Well, I think that you know what is going on and I agree with everything you just said."

"Thanks Kurt."

"No problem. Just when you tell him, be kind about it. I have been watching him since you told me about the ring. He makes those cute doe eyes at you when you're not looking. Its really adorable but I know that he really does feel something for you.'

"I will. I am not like Rachel who blurts out everything I am thinking."

We both start laughing, "She does have a tendency to do that doesn't she?"

The laughter continues and we head back inside and dance for a while longer until everything wraps up and we all head home.

* * *

><p>Guest64: Wow it sounds like everything went off without a hitch.<p>

Bound4Broadway: Most of it. My new step-brother did a little improv on the speech, but otherwise everything else went according to plan.

Guest64: that's good. Did you have fun?

Bound4Broadway: yeah, I had a really good time. Sorry I kind of monopolized the conversation tonight.

Guest64: Its cool, you had a lot goin on.

Bound4Broadway: What did you do this week?

Guest64: Not much. I have been keeping my head down. Not standing out. I am just trying to blend in.

Bound4Broadway: well don't loose yourself. I know that it can be tempting, but if you do the way back is a lot harder than you think it will be.

Guest64: I will keep that in mind.

Bound4Broadway: Well I guess I better log off now. It is time for bed and my pillow is calling my name.

Guest64: Yeah same here. Well night B4B.

Bound4Broadway: Good night to you too 64.

* * *

><p>Sorry for the long wait! I have been busy with the holidays and some lack of inspiration to write. But I got back on the horse and did it. I also would like some feed back, reviews are like candy for the soul and they let me know that you guys actually like what I am writing! Also I think I might make poll to see if Quinn should stay with Sam or not. I will not have her cheat on him cause I like Q too much to do that. What do you guys think? Let me know!<p> 


	5. Chapter 5: Sectionals

A/N: So I have had many ideas running through my head for the last few days. The thing that has sprung from those ideas is a second fanfic. It runs parallel to this one, only it is from Dave's perspective on the events and going-ons of what happens in It Began with a Dream. Please read and review both, because then you will get to see both sides of the story!

* * *

><p>Chapter 5: Sectionals<p>

The Wedding and everything else that happened last week had me in a crazy place. But now things are settled back down a bit. Carol and Finn are moving in this week and then Dad and Carol are going on their honeymoon.

Sectionals are this Saturday too! We have been working on our set list for a while, and it looks like it is going to be the Finchel show yet again. I am so over that.

Mr. Schue walks in late as usual and right away Rachel has to open her big mouth and say something about a ballad for her and Finn to sing.

But Mr. Schue raises his hand and says, "Me first. Two things: First, our competition at Sectionals are your classic school choirs. Great voices, but they don't move. Now if we are going to beat them, we need to do what they can't: dance. Which is why I've decided to feature Brittany and Mike Chang's sweet moves in our performance."

All at once all of us are getting pretty excited about this. It isn't something we have done before and they both have a huge amount of talent. But then of course Rachel opens her mouth again to talk about them dancing in front of her while she sings. She is so self absorbed. Quinn and I exchange a eye roll and then Mr. Schue tells her she wont be getting a solo we and both smiling evilly.

"I was thinking that the winners of our duets completion would take the leads." and instantly I am quietly clapping my hands. This is huge for Quinn and Sam. And maybe it will help them to figure out where they are heading in their relationship.

"Ken and Barbie? A-Are you trying to throw this?" I cannot believe her nerve. But Quinn is faster to say something than I am. "You used to be just sort of unlikable, but now I pretty much feel like punching you every time you open your mouth."

"Okay, listen. I have talked the talk about everyone in here feeling special for over a year now, but, frankly I haven't walked the walk. We have got a lot of talent here, and I am going to highlight it."

And of course Finn has to have his spotlight too, " I am for pumping up the team, making everyone feel special, but that's for practice. You don't take the star quarterback out before the big game."

Tina speaks up, "Easy for you to say when you are the star quarterback."

"This isn't just about me, this is about the team."

Then Rachel and Santana start getting into it like usual and I stop paying attention to them. I am happy Q. This is a big confidence booster. But my attention is drawn back to the cat fight when I hear that Santana tells Rachel about last year. Seeing as Rachel is the only one who didn't know, the rest of us are not surprised.

Mr. Schue finally takes control back from us and we start to rehearse our numbers.

* * *

><p>After rehearsal Quinn and I walk to our lockers together.<p>

"I can't believe that she and Finn had the audacity to protest you and Sam singing for Sectionals. She has quite the nerve."

"Really? You can't believe it? If she hadn't then I might have been worried."

"I suppose." We both start laughing, "So how do you feel about singing? Nervous?"

"Kind of. I mean first of all we are singing 'Time of My Life.' That in of itself is a classic. But then you think of the lyrics, I am not sure that I can relate to them."

"Well, I know you have the ability to pull off the song. As for the lyrics, well, I think this is an opportunity for you and Sam to try and get to know each other better. Maybe he can take you out on an actual date."

"Maybe. I just don't want to ruin our chances for Regional's because my relationship may be on the line."

"Again. You have nothing to worry about. I know that you and Sam will pull it off flawlessly. I have complete confidence in you."

"Thanks Kurt. I wonder who will get the final song. Santana was pretty pleased with herself to be given the big dance number. But the open auditions, that could be tricky, and you know that Rachel is going to try and pull off some huge ensemble that is way too out there."

"Yeah, but I think Mr. Schue likes those ones. He is always showering her with praise, but you barely ever hear you, Brittany, Tina, Mike, or me sing. Everyone else gets their time in the spot light, but us. So I guess I will have to pull out all the stops this time and do my best to wow him."

"Do you have any clue as to what you are going to sing?"

"Not yet. Wanna come over to my place after school to help me figure it out?"

"Sure! I would love to."

"Thanks Q, you are a life saver!"

* * *

><p>After school Quinn comes over and we start looking through my vast collection of music. I probably have over 10,000 songs in my iTunes alone. There is so much to pick from that I have to narrow it down.<p>

"So I want to do something that Mr. Schue wont be expecting."

"That is a good way to grab his attention."

"Precisely. So that means no Broadway, or anything that is even remotely show tuney. And nothing that is sung by a girl. Because I know that I have a tendency to do that as well."

"Well your voice does have the range to do it."

"Yes, but I want to show him that I can step out of my comfort zone and still have that wow factor."

I have moved away from my desk and Quinn takes up my place, glancing at the list that has gotten considerably smaller. Trying to think of something I begin pacing back and forth in my basement room. There are so many options, and so little time.

It is about five minutes later that Quinn squeals excitedly. "I think I have found the perfect song for you." She waves me over and I look at what she is referring to. It is Michael Buble's 'Haven't Met You Yet.'

"It is perfect. It stays true to you, because you have yet to find the perfect guy, and it is non-gender specific, so if you sing it no one can be offended. And you have had your heart broken a few times. I think this is perfect!"

"I think you may be right Q." I practice the song a few times and when I am in the middle of singing for the third time, my dad calls down the stairs to say that he is home and that they are going to start moving some stuff in.

"Sorry but you should probably go. It is going to be chaos around here for while."

"It's okay. I don't think I want to hang around Finn any more than I have to anyway. You know he only did that whole song and dance thing at the wedding because he was intimidated by Sam stepping up to the plate against Azimio. He didn't have the balls to do it so he had to try and show some kind of leadership. Too bad he did it at the Wedding, where only us Glee kids could see it.'

"Well, I think you are right about why he did it, but I am going to give him the benefit of the doubt. I think that he has come around and that from now on he's got my back just like the rest of you."

"I guess that only time will tell."

"I suppose." We walk back upstairs and I show her to the door. "Thanks for the help. See you at school tomorrow."

"Anytime K."

* * *

><p>The next day in Glee, there is a sign up for who would like to audition for the last solo. Rachel is the first on the list and Tina is also signed up. I write my name in the third slot and Artie and Mercedes are behind me ready to put their names on the list as well. I have a small laugh to myself. The five of us were the original people to sign up for the club in the first place, and now here we are fighting for a solo. Things have really come full circle for our group. Well almost. All we have to do is win Nationals, then things will be a complete full circle.<p>

We all take our seats, and that is when Rachel walks in with a piece of Duct Tape over her mouth. I roll my eyes and get my self ready for the load of drama that is about to come out.

"Rachel, what are you doing?" Mr. Schue asks with a heavy sigh.

She sighs and sits down pulling back the tape to answer, "I'm not doing anything. You've silenced my talents, I'm merely protesting. My talents are wasted in this club. My star shines too bright, and I think you are threatened by it."

I have had enough of her attitude. "Rachel, you think that all of us like sitting in the background and swaying with the music. Isn't that what you told Sunshine. That all you need us for is to stand there and look pretty. Well I have something to tell you. Yes you may be talented, so is everyone is this club. We all have voices that are equally as good as yours. And for the last year and a half, it has been the Finn and Rachel show. You two get all the Solos, and the Duets. The rest of us really just stand there and sing back up to both of your engorged egos. And quite frankly, I have had enough of it. And I know that I am not the only one."

The rest of the club mummers in agreement. "Since we have all sat around and watched you take center stage for every major performance we have put on, I think that for this one competition you could show some kind of support for the people who I assume you call friends. Because we want to be heard just as much as you do."

The whole time I am reading Rachel out, all she can do is sit there in complete silence. Not that I gave her time to interrupt, or would have let her. By the end I find that I am standing up from my seat and my hands are spread out to encompass the whole club. Everyone but Finn is cheering, and Mr. Schue just has a look of shock on his face.

"Well, I would say that I have to agree with Kurt. He is right. This Club is brimming with talent and I think that instead of sitting there in protest, you could choose to be happy for the others. Let them have some time to shine. Their starts burn just as brightly as yours does. I think you forget that."

"Well I am not happy about this. About a couple of things actually."

"Well Rachel, you can suck it up. Life isn't always about getting what you want. Its about learning to live with what you're given. Or in this case not given. We all have to deal with it and life goes on. Now I for one would like to start. I am prepared to do my audition piece." I step up in front of the group and signal Brad and the band to begin.

I do a wonderful job. All the emotion that I have just gone through I put into the song. All of my hurt and longing and I also give it all of my hopes and use every fiber of my being. At the end of the song I am breathless. Not because I wasn't breathing but because I very rarely put that much into a song. Maybe that is why Rachel always does so good.

Everyone is on their feet clapping and cheering for me. I blush slightly and take a small bow before heading back over to my seat. Quinn is sitting next to me and she gives me a quick hug and glances around to the rest of the group with a face that reads 'try and top that.'

"Well that was amazing Kurt! If the rest of you agree I think we just found our final number for Sectionals."

Everyone but Rachel is applauding and agreeing. So the vote is pretty much unanimous. I have a solo!

* * *

><p>The week flies by pretty quickly after that. Between rehearsals and moving Carol and Finn in, there really wasn't a whole lot of time for anything else. I did manage to talk to Guest 64 for a little while on Wednesday. The conversation was cut short because of all the work we were trying to get done before my father and Carol left for their honeymoon on Friday.<p>

They were sad that they would miss my Solo, but I think they heard me plenty of times around the house to know what I would sound like.

I told Guest 64 that I have a big part in the production that my club was putting on. I am trying to keep things a bit vague so as to keep some semblance of anonymity. He seemed happy for me and completely understood that I was busy and couldn't talk. But I think he was a bit sad that we couldn't talk like we normally would. And I find that I am too. I have greatly come to enjoy our conversations.

So before I know it, it is Saturday and we are boarding the bus. Rachel has been a thorn in our sides all week, giving only minimal effort. And some of the others have been down. The only ones that seem to be in a good mood are me, Santana, Quinn, and Sam.

Quinn sits with Sam in the seat in front of me, but she turns around so we can talk. I notice that Mr. Schue is talking to Miss Pillsbury. It looks like she isn't coming. And then Rachel steps back on the stairs, "Mr. Schuster, not that I really care, but if we don't leave now, we are going to miss the competition."

She comes back on the bus, shortly followed by a heart broken Mr. Schue. I feel bad for him, but I glare at Rachel. I hate that everyone in this club has suddenly gone into meltdown mode. We have a set list that will rock the judges worlds, but everyone besides those of us with solos look like they might fling themselves off the bus at any moment.

* * *

><p>We all take our seats to watch the competition. The Hipsters are actually pretty good. Their big number is 'The Living Years' by Mike &amp; the Mechanics. Then the Warblers do a fantastic acapella version of 'Hey Soul Sister' by Train. I stand to applaud when they finish encouraging others to give them a standing ovation. They did a really good job and Blaine is kind of become a friend. His vocals were amazing. I can only hope that I will live up to my previous performance.<p>

…

Back in the Green room tensions are running high and everyone is on edge about something. There are a few lovers quarrels going on, and then Rachel walks in how everyone found out. The chain of who told who spirals out of control and then Santana has to speak up and make everything worse.

"Nobody tells you anything because A, you're a blabber mouth and B, we all just pretend to like you."

Puck relaxes back into his seat, "That's not true. I kind of like her."

Then Finn stands up and I start zoning out again. There is so much drama that I am getting sick of it. People really just need to relax and not worry so much about such menial things. So Finn slept with Santana, so what he lied about it. Who cares.

Mr. Schuster walks in the room as Rachel, Artie, and Tina all say that they wont go on stage and perform with the rest of us. I have no idea what Artie's and Tina's hang ups are, but Rachel is really taking this all way too far.

"Enough! Listen to yourselves! I am ashamed of you. Think back to where you were this time last year. In this room, no set list, no choreography. No chance in hell of winning. But you did win. Because you did it together. Even though not all of you were happy with the others. You didn't let that stop you. You may all hate each other right now, but you owe it to yourselves to go out there and remind yourselves, that you are not alone."

* * *

><p>Quinn and Sam open the show with 'The Time of Our Lives' I know that she was nervous about the whole performance. Not sure of how she really felt about Sam, but they are really giving it their all. The crowd is on its feet and we aren't even done. We all regroup and get ready for Santana to sing 'Valerie.' I have heard her sing it a few times all the way through and each time she has given me goose bumps. It is scary how suited her voice is for Amy Winehouse. Mike and Brittany Dance like they never have before. And the whole thing goes off without a hitch. Then the set up for my solo begins. Santana passes me the mic and the music starts is slow change from 'Valerie' to 'Haven't Met You Yet.'<p>

As the group starts their back up vocals, I walk over to grab the microphone stand, and pull it back to center stage where I put the mic back in and start to sing. For this song I will stand stationary as Mike and Brittany start a slower dance than they were doing for the previous song. It looks more like a tap dance than anything. Really telling a story with this one. I throw all of my emotions into this song and belt it out like I did the first time I sang it in front of everyone. Its not till the end that I move away from the stand and walk up belting out the last few lines.

_I'm not surprised, not everything lasts_

_I've broken my heart so many times, I stopped keeping track_

_Talk myself in, I talk myself out_

_I get all worked up, then I let myself down  
><em>

_I tried so very hard not to lose it_

_I came up with a million excuses_

_I thought, I though of every possibility  
><em>

_And you know someday that it'll all work out_

_You'll make me work, so we can work to work it out_

_And I promise you, kid, that I give so much more than I get_

_I just haven't met you yet  
><em>

_I might have to wait, I'll never give up_

_I guess its half timing, and the other half's luck_

_Wherever you are, whenever it's right _

_You'll come out of nowhere and into my life  
><em>

_And I know that we can be so amazing_

_And, baby, your love is gonna change me_

_And now I can see every possibility  
><em>

_And somehow I know that it'll all turn out_

_You'll make me work, so we can work to work it out_

_And I promise you, kid, that I give so much more than I get_

_I just haven't met you yet  
><em>

_They say all's fair_

_In love and war_

_But I won't need to fight it_

_We'll get it right and be united  
><em>

_And I know that we can be so amazing_

_And being in your life is gonna change me_

_And now I can see every single possibility  
><em>

_And someday I know that it'll all turn out_

_And I'll work to work it out_

_Promise you, kid, I'll give more than I get_

_Than I get, than I get, than I get  
><em>

_Oh, you know it'll all turn out_

_And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out_

_And I promise you kid to give so much more than I get_

_Yeah, I just haven't met you yet  
><em>

_I just haven't met you yet_

_Oh, Promise you kid_

_To give so much more than I get  
><em>

_I said love, love, love, love_

_Love, love, love, love_

_(I just haven't met you yet)_

_Love, love, love, love _

_Love, love_

_I just haven't met you yet_

The whole audience is on their feet and I feel the applause reverberating in my chest. The whole of the club is surrounding me and we are all hugging and laughing and crying. There are so many emotions running rampant up on the stage, that it is a miracle that we can all bow and walk back to the green room while the judges make their final decisions.

"Oh my God! That was amazing! All of you guys did amazing! If we don't win, I am asking for a recount!" Tina was jumping around and hugging us all again while giving out more praise.

Mr. Schue comes in and sees that all of our emotions are running high. "You guys were AMAZING out there! I am so proud of all of you."

The talking goes on for a little while, and I don't really say anything. I have never experienced anything like that before. It was the biggest thrill of my life! I know we all did fantastic, but letting it all sink in is taking some time.

There is a knock on the door, and Blaine stick his head in. I walk over to the door and take a few steps away, getting away from the animated talking of the whole club.

"You guys were amazing. Those dance moves were incredible, and your vocals. Man, you blew everyone away. You guys defiantly won!"

"I am not so sure Blaine, you and the Warblers were pretty amazing yourselves. Your arrangements were very modern and classic at the same time. It will be a tough decision for the Judges to make."

"I guess we will have to wait and see. I also wanted to ask you how you've been. I haven't heard much from you lately."

"I have just been super busy. My dad got married, and I planned the whole thing. And then we had to move Carol and Finn in, that took all week. They only just left for their honeymoon yesterday. They really wanted to be here to see us sing, especially since I got a solo, but I knew that they needed the break away. Plus they hear me sing every other day of the week."

"Yeah, but do you sing like that 'every other day of the week?' I mean come on Kurt, that was one hell of a performance."

I blush lightly, not really used to the praise that everyone is throwing my way. Its nice but embarrassing at the same time. "Well no, but it isn't the last time I will be performing."

"True, well, I better get back to the Warblers. Good luck out there! Even though I know you guys don't need it." He gives me a quick hug and walks away. I turn to head back into the room but as soon as I reach the door Quinn steps out and pulls me back so that we wont be overheard by everyone else.

"So that was Blaine?"

"Yes."

"He's cute."

"Q…"

"Well he is. You cannot deny that."

"Okay fine he is. But he is just a friend. Noting more, so don't be getting any ideas."

She holds her hands up in mock surrender, "Okay, okay. I won't."

"Why don't I believe you?"

"Because you are just as devious as I am, and you know that I would only do what is in your best interests."

I sigh heavily. "What am I going to do with you?"

"I am not sure K. What are you going to do with me?"

We laugh and walk back in, arm in arm, to the Green room and sit and talk with everyone else until the lights flash announcing that it is time to go back on stage to see who won.

* * *

><p>When they said that the New Directions won Sectionals and would be moving on to Regional's there was a lot of screaming from us on stage and from the audience. No tie, not third place, we WON! It feels good to know that I had a large part in helping us win. Things are looking up and I can't wait for what lies ahead…<p> 


	6. Chapter 6: How Zombies Bring Us Closer

A/N: I am sooooooo sorry about the huge gap in updates. Life has a way of getting in the way. I hope that you guys didn't give up on me! I will try to make them more regular, but no promises. Life is just too crazy right now.

A/N2: I also wanted to say, how disappointed I am with Glee lately. I thought that they would be bringing back Dave! I know that cannon glee probably wont put Kurt and Dave together, but they planted the seed for Dave to return to McKinley and then Drop it! What the Hell! It makes me mad. Plus the last few episodes have seemed unnecessary. At least The Whitney one had great music! I Hope I am not the only one who feels this way, let me know if I am not alone!

I Do not own Glee, because if I did, Things would be SOOOOOO different!

* * *

><p>Coming back to school after winter break is not my idea of fun. But getting back to Glee club after winning our sectionals and still living on the high of performing is alright with me. Well that is until Artie rolls into the room all red, cold, and shivering from the latest slushy attack.<p>

All the guys start walking out like they are going to take on the whole rest of the football team by themselves, while the Tina and Brittany start to take care of Artie. They don't even make it half way to the door before the rest of the football team starts walking through it.

Insults are thrown and it was apparently Coach Beiste that told them to come to the Choir room. She walks in with Mr. Schue and they tell everyone to take a seat. David looks at me with a look that I can't decipher, and sits with the other football guys glancing at me occasionally with that same unreadable look. I try to ignore him but he keeps doing it, and I am not the only one who notices.

"Why does Karofsky keep looking at you like that?"

"I don't know Q. But it is a little unnerving."

Then Mr. Schue starts talking, "All right, New Directions, let's give a warm welcome to the newest members of Glee Club."

There is lots of shouting from both sides of the room and everyone is putting up a fight to it. I just sit there in silence. They must have some crazy idea hatching; I am not so sure that it will work though.

Finn stands up, "Are you serious? These are the guys that torment us every day."

And Rachel of course has to have her two cents, "And there is no way I am sharing a room with a known homophobe." Quinn glances at me, and roll my eyes a little. But her glance is actually a look of concern. I mouth an, 'its fine' to her, but I am not so sure that she buys it.

"I don't disagree with you guys. But I talked to Coach Beiste about it, and she and I both agree that the kind of bullying that they guys do is born out of ignorance. Having him in here, as difficult as it may be for us, is an opportunity to show all of them that being in Glee Club is kind of cool-find some common ground.

Then the Beiste continues, "All of you are going to be in the Glee Club for one week, no exceptions."

Azimio scoffs, "She's bluffing- next week is the championship game. Without us, she has no team."

"With you I have no team! You guys have gotta find a way to come together or we're going to get out asses kicked from here until Tuesday finds a saddlebag full of buckwheat!"

There is a moment of silence around the room as everyone tries to process what she just said.

"If I have to stay, I'm not singing no show tunes. That is the music of my oppressors." continues Azimio only showing more of his ignorance.

And Finn, still trying to show his leadership skills goes onto say, "Do you even have any idea what we do in here?"

"No, none of them do. We have to show them. Rachel, Puck, haven't you guys been working on something? Why don't you give it a whirl?"

"Fine. As offended as I am by their presence here, I won't let anything get in the way of a performance." as they get up to do Lady Antebellum's 'Need You Now' Finn has a scandalized look on his face. And all I can think is that if you are jealous then you shouldn't have broken up with her in the first place.

As they perform some of the guys on the team start to bob their heads and tap their feet with the music. But for the most part they sit there still and quiet. Not really showing any emotion but boredom. David still glances at me, and I still cannot place how it makes me feel. He has been calm and collected through this whole thing and still has yet to say that he is against this merging of two completely different social cliques.

The song is over and we Glee Clubbers all applaud, and then Azimio has to open his mouth one more time. "The girl with the Mohawk had a really nice voice. And Chaos ensues. I just gather my thinks and grab Quinn by the arm and walk out. There really isn't anything to be done about the Neanderthals that are now a part of our team.

* * *

><p>After school Quinn meets up with me at my locker. "You will never guess what Coach Sylvester wants Brittany to do now."<p>

"What?"

"She wants to shoot her out of a canon!"

"What! Are you serious!"

"Yes. She has gone above and beyond crazy. I just got done talking with Mr. Schue. She can't be allowed to endanger us like this and get away with it."

"No, she can't. Where did she get a canon? Who would sell her a canon?"

"She was saying something about carnies. And the owner's manual is in German.'

"Well that is just the cherry on top isn't it?" We start walking out to the parking lot, keeping our voices low so as to not be overheard by anyone.

"I am not sure how much longer I can stand to be in the Cheerios anymore. She just keeps getting more and more out of control. Plus it isn't fun anymore."

"Well like I said before, I will support you no matter what you decide."

"Thanks K." she loops her arm in mine. "You really are the best gay a girl could ask for."

We both laugh and continue to my Navigator.

* * *

><p>The next day in Glee, Mr. Schue tells us that Coach Sylvester has moved the Cheerleading nationals competition date to the same day that as the Football Championship game. And then goes on to say that we will be doing the halftime show.<p>

And before he finishes the sentence most of the football team is already voicing their chorus of no's.

"We don't have a choice. If we don't do it there's no halftime show."

One of the football guys says, "This is a problem because?"

"It's not a problem, it's an opportunity." Beiste says.

"An opportunity to humiliate ourselves."

"Hey, the whole point of this week was to bring you guys together; to bring the school together."

Azimio and his mouth, "Wait- so you want us to play the first half, change into some 'sequeen' ball gowns, and then go out and do the halftime show at our own championship game?"

"Yes"

"It's the championship game! This is a crazy town. Crazy."

I want to know what Q has for options then, "What about the Cheerios in Glee Club?"

Mr. Schue looks fairly serious, "They have a choice. Us or the Cheerios competition."

"Well, obviously, Quinn is gonna choose the Cheerios I mean…"

"Rachel you don't know anything. How do you know for certain that is what she would decide?" Of course I am going to stand up for my friend. Rachel is always getting up on her high horse.

Trying to bring back a little order, "I think the cheerleading competition is gonna be a lot of fun, but if you go, you're gonna miss out on us doing one of the most iconic songs of all time. The Super Bowl of pop anthems- 'Thriller.'

There are lots of cheers that go up around the room, he goes on to say something about a prison doing the song and how it brought peace and harmony over the land, and blah, blah, blah.

My focus comes back when I hear that it will be a mash up with 'Heads Will Roll.' Now I am getting more excited. This will be a performance to remember. I just feel bad for Quinn, Santana, and Brittany. They have to make a pretty heavy choice. Give up cheerleading and popularity to stay in Glee, or quit New Directions and stay in the top ranks of social status.

I don't get a chance to talk to Q about it because we all head straight to the auditorium for Zombie Boot Camp. This involves moving like a zombie and zombie makeup 101. David and I end up at the same mirror together. We start working in silence and many of the Glee clubbers are watching us. I think that they are all afraid that he will start something with me. But I know better. David has had a small turn around and I think it is all for the better. I am still keeping my guard up around him, but I also want him to know that I can be a friend to him if he will let me.

Still trying to gage how he is feeling about all of this I try to strike up a conversation, "So what do you think about all of this?"

"I don't know? I guess it's not as bad as I thought it was. The dancing part was actually kinda fun."

"You aren't afraid of what other people in this school might think because you had to join the glee club?"

"Well, yeah, I am. But I really don't have much of a choice. If I want to play in the Championship game then I have to do this."

"Oh, I see."

David looks around a bit and after he sees that no one is really listening or paying too much attention he leans in a little bit and whispers, "Actually, I kinda like all this stuff."

I can't hide the look of surprise that takes over my face. "Really?"

"Well, I mean, I don't know." He looks down at his hands. It is a gesture I have been seeing more and more from him lately. Nervous, unsure. It gives me hope that someday he might be able to accept himself. I can see that he is questioning a lot of things in his life. Maybe he isn't a lost cause after all.

"Hey, you know what? No pressure. Who knows, maybe you and some of the other guys will like this enough to consider joining the Glee club after all this is over."

He gives a half laugh, half snort, "Not likely, but who knows."

We continue to work in silence and eventually David excuses himself. He goes over and talks to Finn about doing some kind of warm up number. This could be the start to something better at this school.

* * *

><p>Two classes later Q walks up to me and she isn't wearing her Cheerios uniform anymore. I give her the up down and raise an eyebrow.<p>

"What?"

"Um, where is your Cheerios uniform?"

"Well I was in the girl's bathroom with Britt and Santana when Coach walked in and gave us all a piece of paper that we were to sign and give to Mr. Schue handing in our resignation from the Glee club. I told her I wasn't quitting and if she didn't like that, then she could go to Nationals without me. So I went and changed and gave her my uniform. I quit the Cheerios."

"Oh Quinn!"

"What? It needed to be done. I have just been waiting for a reason to leave. She just gave me one."

"I bet she wasn't expecting you to quit. How did she react?"

"I am not quite sure. I left right after I gave back my uniform. No use waiting around for her to try and convince me to stay when I clearly don't want to be there."

I hug her tight and she hugs me back. "I am so proud of you!" I pull back, "What about Britt and Santana?"

"I am not sure. They both want to stay popular. I don't know what they are going to do. But I also made a decision about something else."

"Oh and what would that be?"

"I am going to break up with Sam."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes I am. We make better friends than a couple. And if I am completely honest with myself, I am not really ready for any kind of relationship. I hurt Finn and he hurt me, Puck, well he was never too serious, and I don't want to hurt Sam because he is a really nice guy. So if I break it off now, with will save both of us a lot of pain in the end."

"Well that is very mature of you Q. I am so proud of you."

"Me too, but now its time to get back to class. Wanna hang out tonight after school?"

"Sure, meet you in the parking lot."

* * *

><p>The next day the guys from the football team and New Directions are putting on their 'warm up performance.' I was asked to join not only by Finn, but David as well. But I declined them both. While they might be comfortable with me I am sure that the other football guys aren't. I don't want to offset the delicate balance that has been created this week.<p>

So I sit in audience with the girls enjoying the performance. The guys actually did a fantastic job. You could tell by the smiles on all their faces that they were having a blast up there.

Mr. Schue tells them how great they did and the guys all walk out of the auditorium together still wearing their zombie makeup. I just hope that this peace lasts for a while. It would be nice if there was less warring going on all the time.

* * *

><p>Sure enough, the peace can never last. The football team got slushied and none of them could take it so they all quit. I thought that they were all braver than that. I guess I was wrong.<p>

Blaine text me and asked if I would like to meet up for coffee with him. I had already make plans with Quinn and he said that I should bring her along if she was willing. So that is how I found myself at the Lima Bean, our local coffee.

"So how are you guys doing on preparing for regionals?"

"That is one of the last things on our mind at the moment."

"Oh, why is that?"

Quinn and I explain what has been going on this week. "It is just so hard to see the guys now. They are all really bummed out about not being able to play the game."

"How many guys quit?"

I take a sip of my coffee, "The only ones who didn't are the ones In Glee, and you can't play a game with only five players."

"Yeah, and Coach Beiste even put a signup sheet to try and get some more guys."

"Well then you guys are in luck. You only need to get four more players. High school regulations let you play a few men short."

Quinn and I look at each other and I know that we are thinking the same exact thing.

* * *

><p>In Glee the guys are trying to figure out a way that they can still play the game.<p>

They all look so defeated. So Quinn and I step out in front of all of them. "This doesn't have to be over just yet. The girls and I want to join the team."

Mike looks like this has got to be the worst joke ever. "Come on guys, stop messing around. Its not cool."

Quinn speaks up, "No, what's not cool is that you guys don't respect us girls and Kurt enough to think that we are perfectly capable of playing football."

"You do know that there will be tackling right. It could end up hurting you."

"We have thought about that. You guys don't really need us to play, just to be on the field. So right after the snap we will just fall to the ground. We won't get hurt that way."

"Well Rachel might think that. But I have been on the team before. I know I was only a kicker but I remember most of the rules. And I would make a good runner. I am faster than most of you guys anyway. Plus I have better hand eye coordination."

"Well I guess if you just lie there you won't get hurt." Coach added

"What do you parents think about this?" of course Mr. Schue has to be the worry wart.

"We all have signed permission slips from our parents giving us the okay." Tina said handing them over to Mr. Schue. "It took some convincing, but they all understand what it means to all of us."

"What do you think Choach?"

"Welcome to the Football team."

We all cheer and start talking about what exactly we are going to do. I can run and kick so I will be doing the best I can. The girls will all be dropping but at least we can play. They guys all seem pretty excited. I think that they had given up hope and now we have renewed it. I just hope that all goes well enough. I am not sure if we will win, but we are sure going to try our hardest.

* * *

><p>Before we know it, it is game night. We are all eager to start. Those of us who don't really play are a bit nervous but the overall mood is thrilling.<p>

…

Let's just say it goes from bad to worse. And it is only the first quarter. We have made a few good plays, and I have actually caught the ball a few times when it has been thrown at me. But it isn't enough to win us the game. We still haven't managed to score any points yet. Then Tina grabs the ball after a fumble and makes a run for it during the second quarter. Things are not looking good. Before we head into the locker room Quinn speaks up. "We can't do this."

"I know but what can we do?" Finn is so defeated.

"Well I am not going to just stand here and take it. Puck, go and convince the football team to do the halftime show and play the second half. I'll be right back."

"Where do you think you're going?" Puck says with a raised eyebrow.

"We can't have a halftime show without some cheerleaders." She runs off and heads toward the parking lot. I head with the rest of the guys to the locker room to start getting into my zombie makeup.

I am surprised when I walk into the bathroom in the guy's locker room to start applying my face. David is standing at the mirror almost done putting his costume together. He jumps a bit like I startled him.

"What are you doing here?"

He stands there for a minute just looking at me like a deer in the headlights. I move to the mirror and start to get ready while waiting for his reply.

"I… uh… well, I wanted to join in on the halftime show. I thought that if I did, coach might let me play for the second half."

"You are right she will. That was the condition after all. Do the show, play the game."

He looks down at his hands and starts to fidget a bit. "I know, I wimped out with everyone else after the slushie facials. I was a coward, but I am not going to just sit by anymore."

"Well then," I turn to face him, "I suppose we should get you looking half way decent." And I give him a half smile.

"Hey, I thought I did a pretty good job by myself."

"Oh you did, except for this little bit of tissue that you have sticking out from the wound on your forehead." I reach up to grab the tissue and he turns his head a bit making it so I just lightly brush over his temple. I quickly pull back, but I am not sure if it is because of the sudden jolt of electricity, or me not wanting to make him too uncomfortable.

We continue getting ready in silence and when we are all done we join the rest of the New Directions, including Santana and Brittany, and the Football team, who have all changed into their costumes. Coach Beiste gives a rallying speech about teamwork and we all hit the field to perform our show.

* * *

><p>The Performance was AMAZING! We all had so much fun, even the football team, although, if you asked any of them, they would deny it. The second half went by so fast. I stood with the Glee Girls and Artie on the sidelines, acting as cheerleaders. Before we knew it we won! Everyone was hugging everyone. But I think that the weirdest part was when I was hugged from behind by a pair of strong arms, and before I had a chance to turn and see who it was, they were gone.<p>

I don't know what this win will mean for the school, but I know that it was a step in the right direction to bring everyone at the school closer. Or at least I hope it was.

* * *

><p>Monday at school everyone was still buzzing about the game. I even heard a few comments about how good the halftime show was! In hearing the buzz and chatter I decided to seek out David. I think it is time that he and I had another heart-to-heart.<p>

I found him on his way to lunch later that day. I ran up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder. He turns around and before he has a chance to say anything, "Can we talk for a minute?"

"Um…sure, I guess so." He nods his head toward an empty classroom and we make our way to it.

As soon as I enter and I hear the door close behind him, I turn and hug my binder to my chest, hopping that he won't get mad at me for what I am about to suggest. "So I did some thinking this weekend, and I had an idea."

"And what would that be?" He looks a little nervous, like just being near me is unbearable and uncomfortable.

"Well, as I assume you have heard, the school is all talking about the game. And not only the game, but the halftime show too. And all of it is good."

"Okay, and?"

"And, I was thinking that maybe you might want to join Glee. I know that I had said this earlier, but now it looks like it might be acceptable."

David stood still with his eyes downcast, shuffling his feet back and forth. His hand went up to his neck and started rubbing it in a nervous way.

"Look, you don't have to join-"

He looks up, "Its not that."

"What is it then?"

"I just don't think I am ready for that. Its too much, too fast." His eyes go back down to his feet.

"That's fine. No pressure." We stand there in an awkward silence for a few minutes. Then David speaks up, even though he doesn't look up.

"I've been talking to someone."

This takes me by surprise. "Really, that's great!"

"Yeah, we have been talking for a few months now."

"That is so good David."

He shrugs his shoulders, "Yeah… Look I should get going."

"Okay."

"Talk to you later." And he walks out the door leaving me alone in the classroom alone.

Maybe things really will turn around. Who knows…

* * *

><p>And remember, reviews are like candy for the soul!<p> 


	7. Chapter 7: Silly Love Songs?

A/n: So I realized after I put up the last chapter that I forgot to include a song in it. I was trying to do one every chapter. So this chapter I am going to give you a double dose, one song by Kurt, and one by someone else.

Here it is a little quicker. And always remember that reviews are like candy. They also tell me what you like and don't like so don't be afraid to speak up. I can take some criticism.

Also I don't own own Glee, too bad though. That would be nice...

Chapter 7: Silly Love Songs?

The week after the football game is a pretty good one. Santana and Brittany joined us and left Coach Sylvester and the Cheerios. So both of them and Quinn are now walking around school in normal street clothes. I had no idea that Santana had an impeccable fashion sense.

As the week has gone on, I have noticed that Finn seems to be getting cockier. Quinn even told me that he tried hitting on her in the hallway at the beginning of the week. Even at home he has been acting weird. Then his little announcement at Glee about setting up a kissing booth, really, well let's just say that it is almost intervention time. The reason for setting up a Kissing booth, you ask. Well that is because Valentine's Day is this week. And let me just say, I am not looking forward to it. I have never had anyone to share the holiday with. I was hoping that these last few years of High School would be different, but as the day approaches I see no dates in my future.

Then there is Mr. Schue's assignment. Pick a partner and sing a love song to them. Well Q and I go for each other. There isn't really anyone else in the club that I would feel comfortable singing something like that too. In fact I think I already know what song I am going to sing.

I try to ignore all the drama that has been going on, but Rachel and Finn make it really hard to do that. Finn keeps making eyes at Quinn, while Rachel is making eyes at Finn. Quinn is fed up with the attention, and quite frankly it is a naissance and a distraction. Maybe this week's assignment will help them both out.

* * *

><p>After school I invite Quinn over and we quickly head to my bedroom and close the door so that Finn wont interrupt us. "So do you know what song you are going to sing yet?"<p>

"Why as a matter of fact Q, I do."

"Really, What is it?"

"You will have to wait and see. I want it to be a bit of a surprise, but what about you? Do _you_ know what song you are going to sing?"

"Not really. I know that I want to get it across to Finn that I am not interested and the fact that I am NOT interested in him. I don't really want to sing a 'love' song, because really, I am not ready for that yet."

"So we need a more non-traditional Love Song." Then I feel like a light bulb goes off in my head.

"Yeah… I suppose. What are you thinking Kurt? I see that look in your eye. That means trouble."

"Oh, it won't be trouble. But you will have fun with it and I know that it is a song you are more than capable of pulling off.

* * *

><p>Quinn and I rehearse her song a few times just to make sure she has all of the little nuances down. Also so I know where I need to add my voice to give it that little something extra. I don't practice my song in front of anyone. Mostly because I am nervous, I have never sung someone a love song. And Q knows that it isn't directed at her, but to whomever it is that I will finally meet.<p>

It is Tuesday night that I end up having the dream again. I haven't had it in a while. I was beginning to think that it was over. But I was wrong. And just like every other time I wake up from it, I can't stop smiling. I know that all day Wednesday I walk around school with a big grin on my face.

It doesn't take Quinn too long to notice that there is something unusual going on with me. During our free period, she pulls me into the empty choir room. "Okay, not that I am complaining, but what is up with you today? You seem to be floating?"

I flush a bit at her inquiry, reveling in the memory of the dream for a moment before I get my act together and respond. "Nothing really, just in a good mood today."

"Bull. I know you too well for you to try and pull a fast one on me Kurt Hummel. Spill." She points her finger at me but has laughter in her eyes, so I know that she isn't mad, just curious.

"Well…" So I told her about my dream. "And you are the only one who knows, so please don't tell anyone about it. Its kind of embarrassing."

"No, I think its sweet." She smiles brightly at me. "You know you can trust me not to tell anyone. I just want you to be happy K. You should have this dream more often. 'Specialy if it makes you glow like that."

I swat her shoulder, giving her a friendly tap. And we dissolve into a fit of giggles, and continue on our way.

"So how often have you had this dream?"

"Oh I don't know. Maybe ten times in the last two or three months, but this has been the first time since I started talking to Guest64." And as soon as the words were out of my mouth I was wishing that I could take them back.

"Wait, talking to who?"

"No one."

"Seriously, did you not just hear what I said?"

"Fine." I sigh and take a deep breath stealing myself the courage to talk about this with someone else. "I started talking to the guy online. It's a gay chat room, and we have been talking for a few months."

"And pray tell, why haven't you told me?"

I give her a half smile and a one shoulder shrug. "I am not sure. Its just been nice to talk to someone who kinda knows what its like. I mean my friendship with you has grown so much this year, but with him its different. He knows exactly where I am coming from. Cause he has been there too."

"Hey, that's good! I am happy that you have been talking with someone. But how do you know he isn't some stalker?"

"I don't I guess. I guess I was just putting a little faith out there and hoping for a good result."

"Has it been worth it?"

"Yeah, it has really. I mean I want to help him too, he isn't out yet, but we usually end up talking about me. He is still pretty shy. But we have gotten to know each other pretty well I would say."

"Okay, well just be careful. You never know who is out there."

I bump my shoulder with hers, "I know Q. I will be."

* * *

><p>That night when I get home from school I decide that to skip my homework and get straight on the computer. My conversations with Guest64 have been good, but like I told Quinn, they always seem to be about me. I try not to keep it about me by asking questions about him as well, but he always seems to turn it around back to me. I would like to get to know more about him.<p>

I log onto the site that hosts the chat and I see that he isn't on yet. So I keep the window open and pull out some of my homework to work on. Math has never been my strongest subject. So I always struggle through the learning process to understand how to work the equations. I really need to get a tutor. After spending an hour working through the assigned work I notice that I have a message waiting for me. Its from Guest64.

Guest64: Hello. How was your day?

Guest64: Hello? You there?

Realizing that I was a little too into my homework I respond.

Bound4Broadway: Sorry, I was working on some homework. And let's just say that math isn't one of my many talents.

Guest64: Really? I thought you would be the book smart type?

Bound4Broadway: Well normally I am. But when it comes to math, I am not sure what it is, but I just don't understand it.

Guest64: Its about the only subject that I actually know what I am doing.

Bound4Broadway: Well maybe you can tutor me. I know I need it.

There is a long pause from him. I think I may have scared him off.

Bound4Broadway: You don't have to. No pressure. I do have to find one though lol.

The pause is still there and he finally gives a response.

Gues64: No, its just that I never thought I would meet you. But now that you have put the idea in my head, I think I would like to. I mean if I can help you that would be good right?

Bound4Broadway: Yeah! Oh wow, I would be so happy for the help! And to finally put a face to the person that I have come to know, well that would just be icing on the cake lol. Maybe meet up sometime tomorrow after school?

Guest64: Yeah sure. But… it would have to be at place a ways away. I am still not sure that I am ready to come out, and the people here are very judgmental. How about meeting up in Findlay, its far enough away that I should be safe.

Bound4Broadway: Are you sure? I don't want to make you do anything you aren't ready for.

Guest64: Yes. I am sure.

Bound4Broadway: Okay, well I guess I will see you Friday?

Guest64: Sounds good.

We exchange numbers so that we can contact each other later and not have to rely on the chat room. And then it hits me. I just scheduled my first study date. I know that it isn't a 'date' date, but still. I guess I am kind of excited.

* * *

><p>Everyone in the Choir room was getting very uncomfortable during Tina's performance to Mike. After he got her back to her seat it was mine and Quinn's turn. Q was up first.<p>

"Now this isn't your traditional love song, but it fits what I want to say to a certain someone right now." She glances in Finn's direction and he looks hopeful. This is going to be fun. She starts and Brittany, Santana, and I add in some extra oh's, and a little extra on the refain.

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Keep drinkin' coffee

Stare me down across the table

While I look outside

So many things I'd say if only I were able

But I just keep quiet

And count the cars that pass by

You've got opinions, man

We're all entitled to 'em

But I never asked

So let me thank you for time

And try to not waste any more of mine

Get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you babe

But I'm not drowning

There's no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree

You are not me

Who made you king of anything

So you dare tell me who to be

Who died

And made you king of anything

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

You sound so innocent

All full of good intent

You swear you know best

But you expect me to

Jump up on board with you

Ride off into your dellusional sunset

I'm not the one who's lost

With no direction oh

But you won't ever see

You're so busy makin' maps

With my name on them in all caps

You got the talkin' down just not the listening

And who cares if you disagree

You are not me

Who made you king of anything

So you dare tell me who to be

Who died

And made you king of anything

All my life

I've tried

To make everybody happy while I

Just hurt

And hide

Waitin' for someone to tell me it's my turn

To decide

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Oh (oh oh oh)

Who cares if you disagree

You are not me

Who made you king of anything

So you dare tell me who to be

Who died

And made you king of anything

Who cares if you disagree

You are not me

Who made you king of anything

So you dare tell me who to be

Who died

And made you king of anything

Let me hold your crown, babe

Oh oh

Ah

Throughout the whole song she is looking at Finn. At first he doesn't get it and has that dopey grin on his face. Then some of the others are looking at him and trying to hide smiles and giggles. Then about half way through, it dawns on him. And his dopey look fades into a look of disappointment.

At the end everyone claps and then Quinn sits down. "Very good Quinn, that was a great dong selection. Although it isn't a true love song, it works, and now its time for Kurt to perform."

I stand up and grab the microphone and stand and bring it to the center of the room. I close my eyes and let myself fall into the music as it starts. When I open them the only thing I see is my mystery guy from my dreams. He is still vague and more like a shadow, but there he is none the less. I pour my heart into the song. Lately it has become so much easier to do that. I know that this song will mean something eventually.

If you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today?

If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way?

If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call

If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all

I'll never know what the future brings

But I know you're here with me now

We'll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am?

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed?

If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head?

If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life?

If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as Mine?

I don't know why you're so far away

But I know that this much is true

We'll make it through

And I hope you are the one I share my life with

And I wish that you could be the one I die with

And I pray in you're the one I build my home with

I hope I love you all my life

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am

Is there any way that I can stay in your arms?

'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away

And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today

'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right

And though I can't be with you tonight

You know my heart is by your side

I don't want to run away but I can't take it, I don't understand

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am

Is there any way that I could stay in your arms

I close my eyes again, and when I open them, everyone is clapping. I wipe a tear from my eye and go back over and sit down next to Q. She holds her hand out and I grab it, giving it a tight squeeze.

* * *

><p>Its Friday afternoon and I am in a coffee shop in Findlay, waiting for Guest64. I suppose when he gets here I will be able to introduce myself and hopefully learn his name as well.<p>

While I am sitting there, my phone buzzes. I check it, hoping that it is him telling me he is almost there.

**From Guest64: Hey, sorry I can't make it today. Talk to you soon. G64.**

Well there goes my afternoon. I send a message back

**Hope everything is alright. Talk to you later.**

****I start to pack up my stuff and pull everything together. As I start out to my can, I notice a red letter-men jacket rounding the street corner. It looked like a McKinley jacket. Wonder who it was?


	8. Chapter 8: New Possibilities

A/n: Sorry for the delay again. Hope you guys haven't given up on me. After the last few episodes I just haven't had the inspiration. Nationals were amazing, but The season finally left me with a lot of questions. I get so mad that too often it becomes the Finchel show. So I am sorry but in my fics, I bash them. I can't stand them. So sorry you have to deal with it. But I am back! I have been toying with the possibility of bringing in an OC. Mostly because I am not to fond of Blaine at the moment. So Kurt needs another friend. I am loosely basing him on me. He doesn't share my past, but he does share some of my personality traits, and a few of my mannerisms. So hopefully you guys will like him. And as always please review. I LOVE feedback!

* * *

><p>Chapter 8: New Possibilities<p>

So after the disappointment of not meeting Guest64 on Friday, I moved on to try and do my best on my homework, eventually I called Quinn and had her come over and help me. Finn was trying to creep on us but Carol told him to go up to his room and leave us alone. He didn't resurface until dinner, and that was pretty awkward. Finn was still trying to catch Quinn's eyes, but the conversation flowed pretty well with the rest of us.

Over the weekend I tried to send multiple texts to 64, but I never got any responses. I hope everything is okay with him. But now it's Monday again, and it is almost like the football game never happened. The locker shoving continues. I have been able to dodge the slushies for now, but I know that it is only a matter of time.

Glee starts with an interesting yet repugnant twist. Coach Sylvester is going to be sitting in on our practices. But Mr. Schue does give us a bit of information about regionals. The overall theme is Anthems. And that is when Sam gets up and starts singing Justine Bieber. Now I detest Bieber himself, but Sam is actually making the song good. He is singing to Quinn. And the three of us know that this is his break-up song to her. They parted as friends, no hard feelings. It is actually the perfect song for the, right now, and it has all the other girls going crazy for him. This is exactly what he needs.

* * *

><p>As I walk down the hallway, I start seeing almost all the girls sporting new looks. They are wearing legwarmers as sleeves? I walk past Rachel and Brittany talking, well more like Rachel is freaking out about something. I could really care less and keep moving. That is when I notice Azimio pushing someone into the lockers, a spot normally given to me and only me. As he makes his way towards me, I stand in an empty doorway, evading notice, and then quietly slip back into the hallway. The person that was pushed into the lockers is now on the floor just sitting there. He is about 5'10" dark strawberry blonde hair that is a bit shaggy, and has quite a few freckles. Thin but you can defiantly see the lite muscle tone. His clothes are a little nondescript, not labels that I recognize. It is hard to read him. He could be just about anyone, but I think he must be new, at least I cannot remember him from anywhere. He doesn't look like he is doing so well, so as the hallway starts to thin out and the bell rings, I go up to him and kneel down to help him pick up his things.<p>

I reach for a notebook and look up into his green eyes, and what I see breaks my heart. I can see the loneliness, the desperation. I instantly know that he is not new to the bullying, but that he was possibly hoping to have left it behind. I finish gathering his things and stand up. Then I hold my hand out to offer him help up and there is an automatic flinch.

All I can wonder is, what has this boy gone through? I kneel back down to look him in the eyes and hold my hand out to him, "I won't hurt you, I promise."

He takes my hand and I help him to his feet. I give him his things and he takes them and embraces them like they are some kind of lifeline. I get a better look at him now; his lip is pierced to the right side, and a tattoo that arcs above his eyebrow that disappears into his hair. It almost resembles something tribal, but I can't be sure. I hold my hand out to him again, "Hi, my name is Kurt, what's yours?"

He looks at my hand for a few moments before he slowly reaches to grab it. He shakes it without applying too much pressure and mutters a simple, "Landon." Much faster than he offered his hand, he takes it back, and I can tell that he isn't really looking me in the eyes. "Nice to meet you, are you new here?"

He nods and grabs his things to him again.

"Okay, well can I help you find your way to class?" He shakes his head no. "Tell you what," I look up and down the hallway. There is no one there, everyone is in class. "Seeing as we are already late, how about we skip, I'll show you a few places in the school that are safe havens. Places that you will not find the jocks, and that the jocks won't find you."

He looks around, and then looks back to his feet for a moment, and then nods his head. I start walking down the halls toward the auditorium; I point out a few places, like the art, Home ec, and music rooms. But the best place above all of them, is auditorium. "The other places are good, but here is a place that you can come to sit in the seats, or even go up on stage. I know that I have come in here many times to try and vent my frustrations with the world. And in almost all of these places, you won't be bothered by others."

He looks around and goes to sit down on the edge of the stage. He puts his things down and crosses his legs, pulls out what looks to be a sketchbook, and starts drawing. Seeing as he will be fine in here, I turn to leave but before I get to the door, "Kurt!"

I stop and look back to him, "Thanks." I give him a short nod, and a look of understanding before heading my way to class.

* * *

><p>Later that day in Glee, the guys, sans Finn, walk in all looking like various versions of Justine. I roll my eyes, and look at Quinn who just covers her mouth to hide the laughter that is threatening to bubble up.<p>

"Well it looks like the guys are ready to give us their anthem. Take it away."

We head to the auditorium to they have the stage to use. And instantly all the girls go to the edge of the stage and freak out. Finn sits alone and looks like he can't believe what is going on. Quinn and I just sit off to the side, enjoying the performance, but not getting all crazy like the rest of the girls. Once again, they make Bieber actually sound amazing. They pull off the song really well. Toward the end of their performance, I notice that Landon has sneaked in and looks like he is about to leave. I catch his eye and give him a small wave for him to join us. He just shakes his head and heads more toward the top of the seats. He probably just wants some alone time. I get it. I just hope that things are going okay for him.

Q notices our interaction and has an eyebrow raised at me. I roll my eyes and quietly say that I will explain later. She keeps the brow up but smiles and we go back to watching the guys make fools out of themselves.

After they are done, I take Quinn backstage and we sit down on some sandbags.

"So who is that?"

"His name is Landon."

"And how did you come to know this Landon?"

I roll my eyes. I know what the real question she wants to ask but I answer the one she verbalized, "I saw him get slammed into the lockers earlier today by Azimio. So I tried helping him. I could tell he needed it, then I showed him some places that the jocks don't go and the auditorium was one of them."

"That's all?"

I start to laugh, but cut is short, "Yes, that's all. What did you think?"

"I don't know, something juicer than that though."

"Believe me Q, you will be among the first to know when I finally do meet someone. Plus I am not 100% sure that he is gay."

"I just want you to be able to find someone."

"Thanks, I will, you just have to stop being so pushy." We laugh a bit and before we leave I look out and see Landon sitting where he was before, and he has earphones in his ears, and a pencil in his hand, drawing or writing something.

* * *

><p>The next day we walk into the choir room and see Finn dressed up like the guys have been all week. Whatever is going on in their heads, I will never know. Quinn and I sit down on the other side of the room.<p>

"What does he think he is doing, hasn't he been bashing the guys all week for dressing like that?"

"I honestly have no idea Kurt. And quite frankly I couldn't care less. He seems to be all over the place lately."

Mercedes and Rachel's diva off, is quite amazing. As much as I can't stand Rachel, she does have one hell of a voice, as does Merc. I am not sure who out diva'ed who, but it was a superb performance. After going over some other things for regionals, and some more song choices, we are free to leave. Quinn and I start walking to the parking lot. We are going over to her house to look for a song or two that could be a good anthem for us. We get in the car, and my phone goes off. I quickly look to see who is texting me, but its only Finn. I put my phone away and suddenly I am in a sour mood.

"Still haven't heard from him?"

"No. It has been a few days. I don't know whether I should be worried or not. He won't respond to my texts, or my im's. It is like he just dropped off the face of the planet."

"Well maybe he has some personal stuff going on. Or maybe he just needs some time to figure things out for himself."

"I know, but I just want to know that he is okay. At least then I could stop thinking about it."

Quinn laughs and I give her a quizzical look.

"Hun, you would continue to think about it either way. If you knew what was going on, you would be thinking of ways to help him."

I glare at her for a moment, before I give her a smile, "Yeah, I suppose you are right. I would do that."

After we get to her house we go to her room and get on the computer and search through our own music collections trying to find the perfect song. We look for a few hours and finally I stumble across one of my favorite albums. It's by Emmy Rossum. I have sung a few of her songs before, and I know that there is a perfect one for us to do. We run through it a few times making the solo a duet.

* * *

><p>So the next day in Glee it is our turn to sing our song.<p>

"I know that this is a song that most of you won't know, but I think that it has a powerful message." Quinn joins me and we sit on a pair of stools in front of everyone. The music starts slow and soft…

Kurt: When she was younger

Stood staring at the door

Waiting for the day that she knew would surely come

Quinn:Tied bows in her hair

Dressed as she thought you'd like

But as time ticked away

Promises fade one by one

Kurt: And now she's all grown

Made it through on her own

Now strong enough to see

That you've been where you want to be

Quinn: No longer dying inside

I will not let you define

Everything I am by one thing that I don't have

Cause I'm more than that

Kurt: I will not be made to hide

These tears won't fall for you this time

Both: I will not be ashamed

Of my name

Anymore

Quinn:Sometimes she wonders

Imagines what you're like

The emptiness inside that made you miss her life

Kurt: The ocean's widen

With all your silence

Leaves the daydreams behind

Childish fantasies unwind

Quinn: And now she knows

You're not coming home

Take the bows from her hair

She's been waiting twenty years

Kurt: No longer dying inside

I will not let you define

Everything I am by one thing that I don't have

Cause I'm more than that

Quinn: I will not be made to hide

These tears won't fall for you this time

Both: I will not be ashamed

Of my name

Anymore

We take each other's hands and keep singing together

No longer dying inside

I will not let you define

Everything I am by one thing that I don't have

Kurt: Cause I'm more than that

Both: I will not be made to hide

These tears won't fall for you this time

Quinn: I will not be ashamed

Both: Of my name

Anymore

Kurt: I will not

Quinn: I will not

Kurt: I will not

Quinn: Anymore

Kurt: Anymore

Quinn: Anymore

Both: I will not

Anymore

The music starts to fade and the song is over. We get a round of applause and we take our seats. Mr. Schue gets back up in front of the class.

"Now that is an anthem. You guys choose a song with a strong, clear message. It had powerful lyrics, and even though the music was softer, and slower, it still had a strong message. Great job guys, now everyone in the room has had a chance to share their anthems. But we do still have one left. Sue has agreed to do a song as well, and she wants all your help."

….

After we sing 'Sing' by My Chemical Romance. I notice that Landon was in the seats again. I excuse myself and go over and sit down near him.

"Did you enjoy the performance?"

He looks up from his sketch pad, "You guys are pretty amazing."

This is the most he has said to me, I am a little taken aback. But I don't let him see that. "I am glad you liked it. You know there are some free spots in New Directions if you would like to join."

He shakes his head, "I'm not much of a singer. Plus I don't do so well with crowds."

"That's okay. You are always welcome to join us though. You don't have to sing. No pressure."

"Thanks for the invitation. I'm not really sure where I belong yet. Things are about the same here as they were in my last school." His eyes go back to his lap, and that sad look comes back to his face. But then he looks up. "You know what; maybe I will come and sit in, it's not like I have anything else to do."

I can tell that he has some inner demons to fight, but that makes him no different from the rest of us. Maybe he will open up more. There are many possibilities.

I say my goodbyes and head toward the parking lot to head home, when I hear my phone go off. I pull it out to see who text me. Its Guest64.

**Guest64: Sorry I haven't gotten back to you. I was dealing with some personal issues. I am not sure that I am ready to meet. But if we could keep talking I think I would like that. Thanks and sorry again**

I am so happy to hear from him, I text back without even thinking.

**Oh it's okay! I am just happy that you are okay! You had me worried there for a while! I hope everything is okay now, and there is no pressure to meet or anything. Of course we can continue talking. I have missed my talks with you! Just let me know when, or text me whenever.**

I wait for a response but none comes, but at least he is okay. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my chest, and I can breathe again. Good thing it's the weekend again…

* * *

><p>Song is Anymore by Emmy Rossum. Go and listen to it! It is AMAZING!<p>

Also, if there are any songs you might like to hear in upcoming episodes, let me know, and I might try to fit them in!


	9. Chapter 9: Assumptions, Friends, & Truth

A/N: So being that I completely changed how this whole 'episode', I have made many changes while still trying to keep to cannon. This is really one of my first HUGE deviations form cannon and I hope you all like it. I must admit I am going through Glee withdrawls and have had to feed my habit by adding three more fanfics to my already long list of ones that I am watching. But I am also trying to keep up on my own. Also, check out my other Fic, No One Can Know. It is Dave's perspective on all the events that are goin on in this fic where he is present, and some are all his own. The chapters aren't as long as these are, and I am more than a few chapters behind on it, but it is a work in progress. I am trying to catch up on it and still keep posting with this one. You don't have to read both, but I thought I would be cool and less confusing to see how Dave is looking at the world without switching perspectives all the time. I know that Dave isn't in every one of these chapters, but that is because this is the focus on Kurt and what he is going through. This story is an eventual **Krave** story, but it takes time to build the relationship. I have a plan. I have been thinking out every episode in the series and how I am going to translate that to my fic, while also adding in my own 'episodes' and adding my own flare to it.

As always please give me reviews! I love feedback and to know what you think of the story so far.

* * *

><p>Chapter 9: Assumptions, Friends, and Truths<p>

So Friday after school I get messages from Rachel, Santana, Noah, and Mercedes about this party that is going on at Rachel's house this weekend. Quinn gets them too, and we have no clue what is going on.

"Do you even want to go? Finn will be there in hopes that you are, Rachel will be mooning over Finn, and I am guessing that everyone will be getting drunk because Puck and Santana know how to get drinks."

"I know that; I don't plan on drinking. The last time I did, I got pregnant, and while I love Beth, it is not something that I plan on going through again till I am much older. I just think that it would be an opportunity for us to let our hair down a little. We don't exactly get invited to many parties anymore, and this way, we can be designated drivers for the rest of them."

"I suppose… But still. It's at Berry's house. How much fun could that be really?"

"No clue. Guess we will have to wait and find out!" She raises her eyebrows and gives me that smirk like she has something planned. I am not sure that I like that look.

* * *

><p>So when I get to the party it is already going. Needless to say just about everyone is already drunk. The only sober ones left are Finn and, amazingly enough, Puck. I also notice that Quinn isn't here yet. I wander down the stairs after a drunken Rachel and she skips her way over to Finn and plasters herself Noah against him. I go over and sit on one of the free couches when k wanders over.<p>

"Hello Noah."

"Hey Hummel."

He sits down starts to shake his leg. I raise an eyebrow at him, "So you haven't joined in the festivities yet?"

"Nah, not really feeling it."

"Really, I thought that you would have been all over a party with free alcohol."

"Normally I would be, but…"

"But…what?"

He looks around nervously to see if anyone is listening, but everyone is too busy to notice us. "Okay, look. I am trying to impress someone and getting drunk would only do the opposite of that."

"Ah. Okay." This is actually a different side of Noah. One that I haven't seen before, and I must say, it is quite the improvement.

We go back to sitting in a companionable silence when the doorbell rings. Rachel is still hanging all over Finn and it seems that she didn't hear it go off, so I decide to go answer it for myself. It is probably Q anyway and I have to tell her about Noah's new attitude.

When I answer the door, I find Quinn standing with Landon. I keep the suspicious look off my face and welcome them in Rachel's absence. "Hello! And Landon, Nice of you to join us!"

He just nods his head and barely meets my eyes. But Quinn grabs me in a hug and whispers a 'surprise' in my ear, softly enough that I am the only one that would hear it. I pull back from the hug still keeping my face in a welcoming smile. "Landon, if you would like, everyone is downstairs. There are drinks and snacks there. Quinn and I will be right down, I just need to talk to her for a second."

He nods his head again, and heads for the stairs. Quinn starts to follow him, but I grab her arm and steer her into the Berry's dining room.

"Just what are you up to?"

She looks at me with her most innocent eyes, "I am not up to anything at all. Why would you think I am?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that you invited Landon. Not that I mind, but why did you invite him?"

"Well he is part of the Glee club now isn't he? And this is a Glee club party, is it not? So he should be here right?"

I raise an eyebrow at her, "Yeah, I suppose, just so long as you don't have any ulterior motives."

"Who me?" she says with a devilish grin, "Never!"

I roll my eyes but give her a small chuckle. Then I remember what I wanted to tell her, "So you will never guess who is downstairs, and not drinking."

"Who?"

"Noah."

"Really?"

"I know I was just as surprised as you are."

"Well this party should be more interesting than I thought I would be."

…

As the party continues, Rachel is still hanging all over Finn and he finally has enough of it and snaps on her. And that is when she starts a game of spin the bottle. Quinn, Noah, Landon, and I are the only ones who do not join in. Kissing my fellow Glee clubbers is not what I consider my idea of fun. Puck has been talking to Q quite a bit throughout the night. But he has also talked with me and surprisingly even Landon.

So during the games of spin the bottle, Landon and I have been making small talk. He has had a few drinks, but not enough to impair his judgment. The talk mostly revolves around how he his first week at school and how things are going for him. He tells me that he has used a few of the places that I told him about, and he found a few of his own. I am glad that he is finding his way but I am sad that he has had to revert to the same tactics that I myself use.

When Rachel gets up to start singing I know that it is time to go. After asking around and seeing that everyone is either staying the night or getting a ride from Finn, I start to head upstairs. Puck and Quinn also choose to leave at this time, not wanting to stay for whatever else Rachel might have planned. As we reach the door Landon comes up behind us.

"Hey, Kurt, could I talk to you for a minute?"

I look back to Quinn and she just nods. "Come on Puckerman. Walk me to my car." She loops arms with him and starts to walk down the driveway, but not before she looks back at me and winks.

I squint my eyes at her and then turn my attention back to Landon. He looks kind of nervous, "What can I do for you?"

"Well I was just wondering… well, if maybe, I could… possibly spend the night at your place?"

I am not sure once to say. For once I am speechless. He sees the look on my face and actually gives me a small smile.

"It's not like that. My mom had to work the late shift and there isn't anyone home. I was planning on staying here, but after…well… that," and he gestures downstairs; I know exactly what he is talking about, "I was just thinking that if you wouldn't mind, I would be able to spend the night at your house."

"Oh." At first I have a sense of relief and then I feel bad. No one should have to sleep in a house all by themselves. I remember what that felt like when my father was in the hospital. So without even thinking about it I tell him yes. We go out to my car, get in, and head to my house.

My curfew was extended tonight for the party, but I am still making it home before my regular time. The lights are all out and my father and Carol are asleep, so I lead Landon to my room. I grab two sets of bed clothes; Landon is about my size. I hand them to him, and then tell him where the bathroom is where he can change. Then I set about making up my sofa bed for him. There is just enough space in my room, which I can pull it out and still be able to walk around. Plus, I am sure that if my father walked in a saw a boy in my room, he is already going to freak out a little.

After I have the sofa bed squared away, I change into my pajamas and start on my nightly skin routine. The last few months I have been cutting back a little bit on it. I realized that using the anti-wrinkle cream and a few other products may be going a tad overboard. So my usual forty-five minute regimen only takes me about fifteen now. Landon walks back into the room, and doesn't even ask where he is sleeping, but just goes over to the sofa bed.

As I finish up and settle myself into bed, "Thanks for letting me crash here. I really appreciate it."

"No problem Landon. I know what it's like to be left alone, and I wouldn't want to do it again. So if you need a place to spend the night or you want to hang out after school just let me know."

He just nods his head and then lays down and pulls the blanket up. So I lean over, turn off the light and go to sleep myself.

* * *

><p>In the morning I wake up and start my morning routine Landon is still asleep on the sofa, he is a wild sleeper. The covers are all over and only one of his legs is still covered. I know that I have to talk to my dad about a few things. One of them being Landon's situation and my offer that I made to him last night. It is easy for me to say everything; I just hope that I can follow through.<p>

Then I hear my father calling me from downstairs. I forgot that I was going to give him a few lessons in the kitchen. I am almost done when he walks in.

"I thought today was the day you were going to teach me about brunch?"

"I'll be down in a sec." and that happens to be the moment when Landon shifts and sits up groggily.

"Oh. Uh, I'm sorry. My bad." He slowly backs out of the room and goes back down stairs.

I finish up and take some clothes into my closet to change and when I come back out, the sofa bed is put away, the blankets are neatly folded and Landon is nowhere to be seen. On top of the folded linens there is a note.

**Kurt,**

** Sorry if I got you in trouble with your dad. I will see you at school on Monday.**

** Landon**

I feel bad that he thought he had to leave. I think it is time to talk to my father.

…..

I go downstairs and find him still in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal. "Morning." I say politely, I still have to judge how he is going to react and I don't want to give anything away. I had told him about Landon when I first met him because I recognized that he needed help. Like I did earlier in the year and there was really no one there for me. But dad doesn't seem so happy.

"You mind telling me what that was all about?"

"What, what was all about?"

"The fact that there was a teenage boy sleeping in your room."

"Well that was Landon. Quinn invited him to the party last night because he just joined Glee this week and she thought that he should be there. Then when we were leaving, he came up to me and asked if he could spend the night-"

"And you said yes without asking me? What so you think that looked like to me?"

"Well it was late, you were asleep. He slept on my sofa bed, and we were both fully clothed the entire time, if that is what you are worried about."

"Actually it is. I am worried that you being inappropriate in my house."

"What if Noah had a sleepover with Finn, would that be inappropriate?"

"That's different."

"Why, because they wouldn't have sex?"

"No, I would never allow Finn to have a girl sleep over in his bed."

"But would I make you uncomfortable if he did?"

"Hey, when have I been uncomfortable with you being gay?"

"So it's not being gay that upsets you. It's just me acting on it."

"I don't know what two guys do when they're together. You know I sat through that whole 'Brokeback Mountain,' and from what I gather, something went down in the tent."

"What do you want from me here, Dad?"

"I want you to apologize for being inappropriate… and promise me that you will never do it again."

"Fine. I'm sorry. I won't have sleepovers with anyone that might be gay without asking you first."

"Thank you."

I start to walk away but I know that I have not even tipped the iceberg of what I want to say. My dad has been nothing but supportive, but there are still times where he can still be a little close-minded. So I turn back to him. "But maybe you could step outside your comfort zone and educate yourself…so if I do have any questions, I could go to my dad like any straight son could. Also, when you want to know why I let Landon stay the night instead of letting him go home to an empty house, let me know."

I walk away, knowing that our conversation is not over, just on hold for now. I need to clear my head, and I think that I need to go for a drive to do just that. I pull out onto the street, and turn on the radio to one of my favorite stations and instantly a song I can relate to come on and I start to sing.

2 AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake,  
>"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?,<br>I don't love him. Winter just wasn't my season"  
>Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes<br>Like they have any right at all to criticize,  
>Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason<p>

'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable  
>And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table<br>No one can find the rewind button, girl.  
>So cradle your head in your hands<br>And breathe... just breathe,  
>Oh breathe, just breathe<p>

May he turned 21 on the base at Fort Bliss  
>"Just a day" he said down to the flask in his fist,<br>"Ain't been sober, since maybe October of last year."  
>Here in town you can tell he's been down for a while,<br>But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles,  
>Wanna hold him. Maybe I'll just sing about it.<p>

Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,  
>And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table.<br>No one can find the rewind button, boys,  
>So cradle your head in your hands,<br>And breathe... just breathe,  
>Oh breathe, just breathe<p>

There's a light at each end of this tunnel,  
>You shout 'cause you're just as far in as you'll ever be out<br>And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again  
>If you'd only try turning around.<p>

2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song  
>If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,<br>Threatening the life it belongs to  
>And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd<br>Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud  
>And I know that you'll use them, however you want to<p>

But you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable,  
>And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table<br>No one can find the rewind button now  
>Sing it if you understand.<br>and breathe, just breathe  
>woah breathe, just breathe,<br>Oh breathe, just breathe,  
>Oh breathe, just breathe.<p>

I hear my phone go off a few times but I just ignore it for now, knowing that I need to just get away from the world and be in my own little world.

After driving for about an hour and singing with the radio a few more times, I pull into the long drive of the cemetery where my mother is buried. I don't come here often, usually I just pay the people who take care of the lawn to make sure that my mother always has fresh flowers. It is hard coming back here, but I also feel like she is the only one to truly understands me sometimes. I sit at her gravestone and check the messages I have. One of them is a voice mail from Dad.

"Kurt, I am sorry that I went off on you without letting you give your side of the story. I just don't want you to grow up to fast on me. It seems like only yesterday we were my little boy who was afraid to leave my side. I know that you had to have had a good reason why you let him stay, so when you get this call me and let me know you are alright. Then we can talk about it and I promise to listen without judging you first." There is short pause and I think the message is over but then quietly I hear him say, "I love you son."

Things have been different for us lately. He has Carol to watch him now. I no longer have to be his caretaker. Sometimes I forget that he just wants what is best for me and wants to protect me from the world's evils. I am about to call him when I notice that I have a message from Guest64.

**Guest64: So I know it's been a while but how are you doing?**

I am happy to have heard from him. He always makes me feel better after I talk with him. Who knows, maybe he can give me some advice.

**To Guest64: It has been a while, glad to hear from you. Things are okay.**

**Guest64: just ok?**

**To Guest64: well I had a bit of a fight with my dad, and I was upset about it. But I think that after I talk to him again things will be okay. How are you doing? What have you been up to?**

**Guest64: Sorry to hear that. Hope things turn out ok. As for me… things are good. I am working on coming out to my mom. I hope I can do it soon. There are some other people I want to tell too but I am still too scared of what their reactions might be. But I think my mom knows and she seems pretty cool with it.**

**To Guest64: well that is good to hear! You will have to let me know when you do decide. I know that it is hard, and you may be nervous, but once you get it off your chest it will be so much better! ^_^**

**Guest64: Thanks. I hope it turns out good too. But if you are still fighting with your dad, you should go talk to him. He sounds like a reasonable guy from what you have told me. I am sure once he is calmed down, he will listen to you.**

**To Guest64: thanks 64. You always know exactly what I need to hear. I think I am gonna go talk to him. I will talk to you later okay?**

**Guest64: sounds good to me. Good luck!**

I get back in my car after saying goodbye to my mom and drive home. When I get there my Dad is still sitting in the kitchen. He looks up when he hears the door and when he sees me before I know what is going on, I am engulfed in a big bear hug.

At the same time we both say, "I'm sorry."

Then we laugh and sit down. I start to make some tea for us, it is better than coffee and healthier for dad.

"So you said when I was ready to know why you invited him to spend the night to ask. So here I am asking."

I pour two cups and stir in some sugar for my dad's and sugar and creamer for mine then sit down beside him again. "The only reason I let him stay here is because he said that his mom was working the graveyard shift and he would be home alone. I know what that is like, and that it isn't any fun. So I said he could sleep here anytime he wanted cause no one should have to be alone. I know that I should have run it by you first, you were asleep and nothing happened. I promise."

"I trust you that nothing happened. I am sorry that I jumped to conclusions without asking you first. And yes I agree. He can spend the night anytime. He is only a teenager and he shouldn't be alone. But I would like to talk to his mom too, just to make sure it's okay with her. And when he does spend the night I expect him to either be on the sofa in the living room, or on your sofa bed. No sharing a bed with him."

I roll my eyes at him but then I grab him in a hug again. "Thanks dad, and I love you too."

* * *

><p>The song is Breath (2am) by Anna Nalick<p> 


	10. Chapter 10: Learning new things

A/n: So I am not sure I want to continue with Dave's side of things. I like where I have this Fic going, and it is hard to try and write two at the same time. Maybe after this one is over and before the sequel. And yes there will be a sequel. I have so much planned for this fic, you don't even know. Also the actor I picture for Landon is Cameron Monaghan. He plays on a show called Shameless, and while the two characters are quite different, I do see the red hair, half smile, and cute freckles when I picture Landon. I hope this is a good reference for you guys too.

Let me know how I am doing, take five seconds and fill out a review. I just like to get feedback, and to know how you guys like it!

* * *

><p>Chapter 10: Learning new things…<p>

With the way my weekend went, I thought that this week would be a piece of cake. Little did I know that Mr. Schue would make it our 'sexy' week. What are we supposed to do? Sing songs about how sexy we are? I know that some people in the class need to know the facts of life, but is this really the platform to talk about it? Don't we have a health class to teach us that stuff?

Then Miss Holiday sings her song, and well the whole club gets into it and I have to admit, that just like last time, she kind of blew us all away. Rachel sits off by herself, and doesn't really join in. I think that it makes her uncomfortable. Most people would think that I would be as well, but really, what teenage boy doesn't think about it. I would never watch those kinds of movies, but I have thought about it before.

I know that we got those lessons in school, but I never really knew what to do with the information. Plus I never got the 'birds and the bees' talk from my father. I think he is afraid because he doesn't know what to say. The fact that I am gay, and would not have any kind of relations that he would know about, messes with the talk that most kids my age would get. I just hope that he takes what I said the other night to heart. I wish I could go to him for advice. It is hard not being able to.

* * *

><p>Now I know that I am not the sexiest person alive. I am by no means one of the best dancers in Glee, but I can hold my own with choreography. I really don't know how to be sexy unless it is the fake kind. I can play around and be funny about it, but I can't sell sex appeal.<p>

So Quinn and I decide to have a movie marathon after school. I invited all the glee girls and Landon to join us, but only Landon could come. Mercedes had something going on with her church, Tina made plans with Mike, Brittany and Santana said they had to work on a project, and I suppose I did forget to tell Rachel. Oops.

But Landon said that he didn't have anything better to do and his mom was working late again. So I asked my dad and we turned out movie marathon into a sleep over. I know it is very middle school, but I haven't had any one to do this with in a long time.

So the movie lineup is Flashdance, Burlesque, and we finish with all three step up movies. I think that they all have amazing music, and dancing. At first Landon doesn't seem to be having fun, but after we get halfway through Flashdance, and Q and I are dancing around the room, it doesn't take long for him to join us.

I am so happy that he does, because this is the first time I think I have actually seen him smile or heard him laugh. I know that we are all having a great time when the last movie plays. We are all exhausted from all the dancing, but I think that all of us have a few new moves.

That is when I get the idea for us to do a song for Glee! I know that we weren't exactly given an assignment, but I have the perfect song for us to do. I know that Q is pretty, but I don't think that most people would think of us as sexy. So I think this would be the perfect opportunity to prove them wrong. I tell Quinn and Landon of my plan and surprisingly enough, they are both in. This is also the first time that the Glee club will be hearing Landon sing, so I guess that this is also going to be his formal audition.

We stay up way to late practicing, and just having fun. Come to find out, Landon has an amazing voice. He sings 'Mr. Brightside' by the Killers to show us just exactly what he can do. If I had never heard that song before, I would have thought he wrote it. He took all the emotion that I believe he is hiding from everyone and put it all behind his performance. I am just so blown away. We don't have a voice like his in the group and he will definitely add to our already bountifully talented group.

I am so glad that my walls are sound proofed. Something my father carried from our old house to the new one. As we are getting ready for bed, Quinn goes to use the washroom, and that leaves Landon and I alone.

"Hey, thanks for coming over tonight. This was a lot of fun."

"Thanks for having me. My mom is happy that I am making new friends, and that I have somewhere to be when she isn't. It has been tough since we moved here, I think we are both still trying to get used to things."

"Anytime Landon, if you don't mind my asking, why did you move here?"

"Well… my mom and dad got divorced. He was going to kick me out after he found out that I was gay, but mom wouldn't let him. He made her choose between him or me. So after the divorce was finalized, we didn't have anywhere to go, and she needed a job. She just happen to get one here at dinner. It's a dive but it pays the bills."

"I am so sorry. Well if either of you ever need anything don't be afraid to ask."

"Thanks Kurt. And sorry that I have been kinda quiet. I am still dealing with a lot of stuff in my head."

"It's alright, just know that me and Quinn are here for you if you ever need to talk."

Quinn comes back into the room shortly after that. I think she heard us talking, and gave us some space. I am glad that she did. I am not sure that Landon would have opened up like that if she were in the room. I just still feel like he is hiding something, but I am not sure what.

* * *

><p>The next day in Glee club, Santana, Brittany and Miss Holiday sing 'Landslide' in Glee. I look at the way that Santana looks at Brittany, and Brittany at Santana. Something is off. I mean I know that they are friends and are really close but what could this song mean. It doesn't fit in the theme for the week, but it was obviously important to them. The few times that Santana is near tears almost breaks my heart. She loves Brittany.<p>

I don't know how I didn't see it before. After class, I tell Quinn that I would meet up with her and Landon after school to work on our performance, but I really wanted to talk to Santana. She heads out of the room by herself, and I follow quickly. As I catch up to her I match my pace with hers, "Hey, can I talk to you for a moment?"

She stops in the middle of the hall and turns to me, "What is it ladyface?"

"I think this is a conversation best had in private, away from prying ears."

"Look, anything you have to say to me you can say right here."

"It's about you and Brittany."

Instantly her face falls and she takes my arm and leads me to an empty classroom. After the door is closed, "Look I have no idea what you think you know, but I am pretty sure that you are wrong."

"Santana, I only want to help you."

"How are you going to help me?"

"Well I can be someone to talk to."

"Look ladyboy, I don't need your help." She starts to walk to the door.

"Well if you ever want to talk about how you really feel about Brittany, let me know. And don't worry. I won't tell anyone your secret."

She opens the door and turns back to me for a moment before heading into the hallway.

* * *

><p>After school and rehearsal for our number I head home. When I get there, dad is already there and he calls me to the kitchen. I walk in and he is standing there with a serious face. At first I think I am in trouble, but then he slaps down a few pamphlets.<p>

"What are those?"

"Those are some pamphlets that I picked up from the free clinic. I thought it might help the process along because it is time you and I had 'the talk'"

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes it is. You told me to educate myself we I am trying. I want to do this even less than you do. This is gonna suck for both of us, but we are going to get through it together and we will both be better men because of it."

I go over and sit at the kitchen table, and he sits across from me. I know that I wanted him to talk to me and help me get this information, but I just did not expect it so soon after I had asked him to. I guess this just goes to show me how much he loves me. He is willing even though it will be outside his comfort zone.

"Now, first, most of the, um, mechanics of what you're going to be doing is covered in the pamphlets. Okay, so, I want you to read them and then I want you to come and talk to me about it. Deal?"

"Okay."

"Now for most guys sex is just this thing we want to do. You know, it's fun, it feels great, but we're not really thinking too much about, you know how it makes us feel on the insides or, you know, how the other person feels about it."

"Women are different?"

"Only because they get that it's about something more than just the physical. You know when-when you are intimate with somebody in that way, you're exposing yourself. You know, you're never going to be more vulnerable and that scares the hell out of a lot of guys. Believe me I can't tell you how many biddies I've got who have gotten in way too deep with a girl who said she was cool with just hooking up."

"But, that's not going to happen to me, Dad."

"No. It's going to be worse, okay? Because its two guys. With two guys, you got two people who think that sex is just sex. It's gonna be easier to come by, and once you start doing this stuff, you're not gonna want to stop. You got to know that it means something. You know, it's doing something to you, to your heart, to your self-esteem even though it feels like you're just having fun."

"So what you're saying is that I shouldn't have sex?"

"I think on your 30th birthday it is a great gift to yourself." I roll my eyes at him and give him a very sarcastic look. "Kurt, when you're ready, I want you to be able to do everything. But when you're ready, I want you to use it as a way to connect to another person. Don't throw yourself around like you don't matter. 'Cause you matter, Kurt."

"Is that all?"

"For now."

I get up and take the pamphlets. "Thanks dad. I really appreciate this."

He just nods his head and I go to my room to look over my new reading material.

I head upstairs and look through them quickly before I set them aside. I am not quite ready to read them right after the talk I just had with my father. So I try to distract myself.

**To Guest64: So I just had the most embarrassing think happen to me.**

It takes a few minutes, but I get a response.

**Guest64: What happened?**

**To Guest64: my father just gave the 'birds and the bees' talk… how mortifying!**

**Guest64: Lol. Hey at least he gave it to you. I know some guys who still think that babies come from the cabbage patch. **

**To Guest64: Really? **

**Guest64: Yeah. But they are not the brightest bunch of guys. Probably taken one too many hits to the head from all the Football.**

This has me laughing. I fall back on my bed. I love that no matter how bad or embarrassed I feel, he can always make me laugh.

**To Guest64: Well just make sure you wear all your protective gear. I wouldn't want you to lose your sense of humor to a concussion. **

**Guest64: don't worry. I always do.**

**To Guest64: well thanks for making me feel better. I guess I had better read the pamphlets my dad got me.**

**Guest64: he gave you pamphlets?**

**To Guest64: yeah, I think some of this stuff he still isn't comfortable talking about. And to be quite honest, I am glad. There is only so much of this that I could stand hearing from my father.**

**Guest64: Well I think that it is pretty cool that he talked to you about it. A lot of dad's with gay sons probably wouldn't.**

**To Guest64: Yeah I guess I got it pretty good. Thanks again. **

**Guest64: anytime.**

I put my phone down and start reading. I suppose I have to start somewhere and putting off the inevitable will only make it worse later.

* * *

><p>At lunch Quinn, Landon, and I had one last rehearsal. We just wanted to make sure that we were all at the top of our game for this. So later in glee when Mr. Schue is about to lead us into practice for regionals, I pipe up, "Um, Mr. Schue?"<p>

"Yes Kurt?"

"I know that there wasn't an assignment this week, but Quinn, Landon, and I put a little something together."

"Oh, well the floor is yours."

We get up in front of everyone, starting with microphone stands. Quinn takes point and Landon and I flank her.

[Quinn]

Where's all mah soul sistas

Lemme hear ya'll flow sistas

[All]

Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, flow sista

Hey sista, go sista, soul sista, go sista

[Quinn]

He met Marmalade down IN old Moulin Rouge

Struttin' her stuff on the street

She said, "Hello, hey Jo, you wanna give it a go?" Oh! uh huh

[All]- (Kurt)

Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya dada (Hey hey hey)

Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya here (here)

Mocha Chocalata ya ya (oh yea)

Creole lady Marmalade

At this point we leave our own stands and move so Landon it at the lead mic. Every move we make while at the microphones or moving from one to another is using what we took away from those movies, with our own personal flair thrown in. I know that we aren't sex on legs, but I think that those who underestimated us are quite surprised.

Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir

Voulez vous coucher avec moi

[Landon]

He sat in her boudoir while she freshened up

Boy drank all that Magnolia wine

On her black satin sheets is where he started to freak

yeah

[All]- (Quinn)

Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya dada (da-da-da)

Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya here (here ohooh yea yeah)

Mocha Choca lata ya ya (yea)

Creole lady Marmalade

Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir (ce soir, what what what)

Voulez vous coucher avec moi

Again we move in a circle to new mics so that I am at the front.

Marmalade... Lady Marmalade... Marmalade...

[Kurt]

hey Hey Hey!

Touch of her skin feeling silky smooth

color of cafe au lait alright

Made the savage beast inside roar until he cried,

[All]

More-more-more

[Landon]

Now he's back home doin' 9 to 5

Landon detaches his mic and toward the front of the room to stand in front of me a little.

[Quinn]

Sleepin' the grey flannel life

Then it's Quinn's turn.

[Kurt]

But when he turns off to sleep memories creep,

More-more-more

And lastly, I step forward. We are all still dancing in our own ways, but still trying to keep a common theme with each other.

[All]- (Landon)

Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya dada (da daeaea yea)

Giuchie, Giuchie, ya ya here (ooh)

Mocha Choca lata ya ya (yea)

Creole lady Marmalade

[All]-(Kurt)

Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir (ce soir)

Voulez vous coucher avec moi (all my people yea)

Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir (ce soir)

Voulez vous coucher avec moi (C'Mon! uh)

Creole Lady Marmalade Yes-ah...

After we finish, we get the standard applause, but I can see that a few of the Glee clubbers are giving us appraising looks. Puck is unabashedly staring at Quinn. Tina, Mercedes, and Brittany jump up and crowd me. Franticly telling me how good I looked, and Rachel is sending shocked looks to Landon and anyone who will make eye contact with her. I bet she wasn't expecting that voice to come out of him. I hold my hand out to Quinn and then to Landon, and they both slap it. We totally nailed it.

After we sit down, Mr. Schue gets back up in front of us. Probably to give us some kind of pep talk that we don't really need. I ignore half his speech, just catching the welcome to Landon, and to say what an audition.

So it's official, Landon is officially one of the New Directions. Now all we have to worry about is Regionals. Speaking of them, Rachel takes it upon herself to tell the rest of us that the while songs we have selected are good, they are not good enough. She suggests that we write our own original songs. The whole club is against it, but I think she may just have a point. Maybe I will have to start working on something. Just in case, like every other time, Rachel Berry gets her way.

We all walk out of practice and I head to my locker. That is when I see Santana pass me on her way to Brittany. After figuring out Santana's secret, I can't help but watch what is going to happen to the two of them. Although Santana and I have never been friendly before, I know what she is going though, and I want her to have someone to talk to. Much like I want to be there for Dave. I just hope that she doesn't shut me out like David it. He ignores me in the hallways, and refuses to make eye contact with me. But he doesn't have a look of disgust on his face anymore. He seems calmer, more relaxed. Maybe he is figuring it out on his own.

I just wish the best for both of them. It's tough to be in their shoes.

* * *

><p>The song is Lady Marmalade- the Christina Aguilera, Mya, Pink, Lil Kim, and Missy Elliot version. I did cut some parts out because it didn't fit the voices of any of the three singers.<p> 


	11. Chapter 11: Regionals & Original Songs

A/n: Sorry for the long update. I wasn't sure how I wanted to take this chapter, but here it is. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>Chapter 11: Regionals and Original Songs<p>

It has been a couple of weeks since Landon joined the New Directions, and I had the 'talk' with my father. Since then we have all been pretty busy with getting ready for regionals. Coach Sylvester made up some lie about us, and apparently wrote to My Chemical Romance, and now we can't use sing for one of our songs. That was a pretty major blow to us. But true to Rachel's fashion, she steps up and once again suggests that we perform original songs, and like I predicted, she got her way.

I am glad that I have been working on one of my own since she brought it up the last time. From what I have heard of her songs so far, they are nothing to be impressed with. I also brought Quinn and Landon in on it as well. I just want to make sure that it would be nothing short of amazing, and with their help I think we have done it.

We are going through a couple of the other's songs that they have come up with, but let's just say that they leave something to be desired. The only one who has come close is Mercedes. Her performance was great, the song had a strong message, but it was too in your face. I think we are all heading in the right direction.

Rachel has been pretty AWOL since Mr. Schue gave us the go ahead to start writing. She must be working on her song alone. So without her, we end up writing 'Loser Like Me.' Which I have no words for. It is most defiantly an anthem for our group. I love that we all put something into it. When it came time to give out solos for it, almost everyone who wanted one got one. It is a song representing all of us, so I think that it's right that all of us sing it.

After we are done figuring that out, I decide that it is time to share my piece that I have been working on. Quinn steps up with me to help sing it. This song is called 'Your Light.'

[Kurt]

The tears I cry into the darkness

Are not for you, but for my sanity

Though I put on a brave front

I'm slowly dying from insanity

[Both]

I search for love, I search for peace

In this crazy journey we call life

I crave for passion, I crave for you

Please let the light shine through

[Quinn]

I'm so confused, I just don't get it

This isn't the life I was meant to lead

Every time I see the Darkness

I end up crying myself to sleep

[Both]

I search for love, I search for peace

In this crazy journey we call life

I crave for passion, I crave for you

Please let the light shine through

[Kurt]

Here in this moment

I see the dark

The light is so far away

[Quinn]

If you come closer

Into the dark

Your light will find a way,

to me

[Kurt]

I search for love, I search for peace

In this crazy journey we call life

[Quinn]

I crave for passion, I crave for you

Please let the light shine through

[Both]

Please let the light

Oh, Please let the light shine through for me...

It starts really soft and slow. The first two verses and refrains are similar. But the last verse picks up, and changes from melancholy to something with a spark of hope.

After we are finished with the last note, the room is silent. Everyone is staring at us and some of them have shocked expressions, while others seem to be waiting for more. Mr. Schue steps up; he is one with a shocked look on his face, "You guys… that was AMAZING!"

That is when the rest of the club comes to their senses, and start cheering. "When did you write this?"

"Well, it is something that Quinn, Landon and I have been working on for a few weeks. I was just waiting for the perfect time to share it."

"Well I defiantly think that this song with the one you guys just came up with is going to put us over the top! Now we just have to wait to see what Rachel comes up with."

I know that whatever it is better be amazing, because if it is anything like 'My Headband' or 'My Hairbrush,' we are sunk.

* * *

><p>While getting things from my locker I notice that Brittany walks up to Santana and tries to talk to her again, but Santana just blows her off. Brittany looks so hurt, and I know that Santana is hurting too. She just tends to take her hurt out on others, instead of dealing with it herself. As Santana walks off, I follow her. If I can talk to her one-on-one again, maybe I can help her.<p>

She walks into the auditorium and sits down. "I know you are following me Kurt. So you might as well get in here and say what you think you need to."

I step in and go to the row of seats before her and lean on the back of one crossing my arms across my chest. "I just wanted to say, that I know it's hard. But pushing Brittany away isn't going to help you. She really does care about you."

"If she cared so much then why the hell is she still with four-eyes on wheels? I am way hotter than he is."

"She is with him because he treats her nicely. He treats her like a human being. Most people in this place have called her stupid or dumb at some point. There are only a handful of us that haven't. Artie happens to be a good guy, and she sees that."

"Well I still think that she is making a mistake."

"Okay, well that is your opinion, and you are entitled to it. But in my opinion what you are doing to Sam is wrong too. I know that you are 'dating' but you are just leading him on."

She stands up and takes a very defensive and defiant stance. "You have no clue what you are talking about. Troutymouth makes me very happy. We are happy together. Just cause you wave a rainbow flag all over the place doesn't mean I have to."

I stand up and start to walk away. "Well if you ever feel like being honest with yourself, what I told you before still stands. If you need to talk, I am here."

I walk out of the auditorium feeling sad. She may not be ready to face the truth, but it will get out. The truth always gets out.

* * *

><p>Walking through the hallways has been easier lately. Landon and I always make sure to be in someone else's company. Usually Quinn's, but Puck has been hanging around with her quite a bit. I don't know if she asked him to or if he just took it upon himself, but he has even walked with me a few times.<p>

Azimio still makes his threats when I am alone. I still get shoved into the lockers, and the random slushies do appear, but it isn't anything that I can't handle. What is surprising me the most though, is that David is not seen in Azimio's company anymore. He still wears the letterman jacket, but he no longer plays the part of jock. I have noticed that he seems to be losing weight, but not in an unhealthy way, more like he has been working out, or just trying to slim down. I am not sure what has brought on this new change in him, but I am happy that it is happening. He seems happier and calmer now. I have even seen him talking to Landon a few times.

I don't know what to make of it, and I haven't asked Landon what they talk about either. I know that since he is new here, he needs to make friends, and I am not one to dictate who those friends can be. I just hope that he is careful, and that David doesn't try anything funny. I don't think that he would, but I am still unsure. As much of a target that I am, Landon is one even more so. He has this vulnerability about him. I know there is something that he isn't telling me, but I am not sure what it is. I know that he will tell me in time, but until then I think that it will remain a mystery.

* * *

><p>I haven't heard from 64 for a few days, and although he wasn't ready to meet in public I wanted to invite him to the regionals competition.<p>

**To Guest64: Hey, how have you been lately?**

**Guest64: Not bad. I actually have been making some new friends, and have been reconnecting with my mom. I am pretty sure she knows, but she isn't asking me about it. **

**To Guest64: Most parents know before you do. It's just in their nature. But if she isn't pushing, and isn't trying to set you up on dates with girls, she will probably be okay with it. What about your dad?**

**Guest64: I am not sure. He works a lot of late hours, so I don't see him very often. I don't know how he will take it.**

**To Guest64: Well like I told you before, when you are ready to come out, you will. If you ever need to talk about it or need any help just let me know.**

**Guest64: Thanks. How are you doing?**

**To Guest64: I am alright. Actually I wanted to invite you to something. I am in a show choir and we made it to Regionals. It isn't too far away and I would like it if you were to come. I know that you may not be ready to meet, but this is a way for you to sort of meet me. **

**Guest64: I'm not sure, when is it?**

**To Guest64: It is this Saturday. The whole thing will only be like an hour or two. There are only three groups of us performing, and we have small breaks in between each group. You wouldn't have to come and introduce yourself or anything. Just knowing that you are in the audience would be great!**

**Guest64: I am not sure if I can make it. But if I can I will let you know alright.**

**To Guest64: Okay that sounds fair. I will text you the information. And no pressure okay, if you are not ready then you don't have to come.**

**Guest64: kk**

I really hope that he can come. I really want to meet him but if he needs some time I can understand that.

It seems that I am doing an awful lot of waiting lately. I didn't used to be this patient with people. I guess like everyone else around me, I am growing up. When did that happen?

* * *

><p>So Rachel ended up writing a pretty amazing song. I would never admit that to her of course, but it is amazing none the less. Her song will be first, mine second, and then the big group number is third. When I presented my song to everyone, they just assumed that I was going to be the one singing it. But I thought that it might be a tad too emotional for me to truly do it justice. Instead I decided to give my part to Landon. I know that his and Quinn's voices with work well together, and neither one of them have solos in the big group number. So this is their chance to shine and really show that we are a Glee club brimming with talent.<p>

…

Aural Intensity is up first. This is the group that Coach Sylvester had been grooming for the last few weeks. And while their voices were good, the song selection was obviously directed to the judges. I think that their rendition of 'Jesus is a Friend of Mine' was good, but definitely not appropriate for this venue.

We miss the next group that is up and I can't remember their name. We are all in the green room getting ourselves ready. We are all running over our lines, and working out any last minute kinks. Then we are up.

…

Rachel delivers and amazing performance. I am reminded that although she is one of the most annoying people I know, she is also one of the most talented. And it is that attitude and ambition that will get her far in whatever she does. But again, I would never admit that out loud. Then Quinn and Landon take my song exactly where I knew they could. They both put the power and emotion in it that it needed. I am so happy that they were the ones to sing it. Lastly the whole group goes out and it's time for 'Loser Like Me.'

[Tina]

Yeah, you may think that I'm a zero

But, hey, everyone you wanna be

Probably started off like me

You may say that I'm a freakshow

[Santana]

(I don't care)

[Mercedes]

But, hey, give me just a little time

I bet you're gonna change your mind

[Brittany]-(All)

All of the dirt you've been throwin' my way

It ain't so hard to take, (that's right)

[Santana]- (All)

'Cause I know one day you'll be screamin' my name

And I'll just look away, (that's right)

[All]

Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth

So everyone can hear

Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down

Baby, I don't care

Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out

You wanna be

You wanna be

A loser like me

A loser like me

[Finn]

Push me up against the locker

[All guys]

And hey, all I do is shake it off

I'll get you back when I'm your boss

[Finn]

I'm not thinkin' 'bout you haters

[All Guys]

'Cause hey, I could be a superstar

I'll see you when you wash my car

[Kurt]- (All)

All of the dirt you've been throwin' my way

It ain't so hard to take, (that's right)

[Puck]- (All)

'Cause I know one day you'll be screamin' my name

And I'll just look away, (that's right)

[All]

Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth

So everyone can hear

Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down

Baby, I don't care

Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out

You wanna be

You wanna be

A loser like me

A loser like me

A loser like me

[Artie]

Hey, you, over there

Keep the L up-up in the air

Hey, you, over there

Keep the L up, 'cause I don't care

[Sam]

You can throw your sticks, and you can throw your stones

Like a rocket, just watch me go

Yeah, l-o-s-e-r

I can only be who I are

[All]

Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth

So everyone can hear

Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down

Baby, I don't care

Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out

You wanna be

You wanna be

A loser like me

A loser like me

Just go ahead and hate on me and run your mouth

So everyone can hear

Hit me with the worst you got and knock me down

Baby, I don't care

Keep it up and soon enough you'll figure out

You wanna be

You wanna be

A loser like me (A loser like me)

A loser like me (A loser like me)

A loser like me

After we through the confetti slushies the crowd that was already going nuts, just went crazy. I think they liked it.

We went back to the lobby, to wait it out and it didn't take long for the judges to decide. We got back on stage and the announcer didn't even bother with second place, and the runner up. Just went straight to the winner. When she said that the New Directions won, I was frozen in place for all of two seconds before I was jumping up and down with everyone else. It was amazing! We won, and with our own music! My day couldn't get much better than this.

…

After we all got back on the bus to go back home, I check my phone. I left it on the bus and never got a chance to go out and get it. I see that there is a text from my dad telling me congratulations and one from Carol as well, saying how great of a job we did. There is also one from 64.

**Guest64: So I made it, and I saw you perform. I am pretty sure I know who you are, just from the way you described yourself. And I just have to say that you were amazing! Those songs were sooooo good! Did you guys write them? Congratulations on the win too! You so deserved it. You guys were sooo much better than either of the other groups!**

I am just on top of the world right now. He came to see me. I feel my face start to flush a little bit. It must be from all the excitement that today has brought. I think that we might stand a very good chance at Nationals. If we do more original songs that could give us the edge we need to win over those judges. Even If we only make it into the top ten, that would be enough for me. I send a text back to 64 telling him all about it. It is actually more than one text I send him paragraphs and we text almost all the way home. We celebrate too, and nothing can bring us down right now.

* * *

><p>'Your Light' by me<p>

'Loser Like Me' by the cast of Glee

Okay, so a few things…

Don't judge my song too harshly. I needed to put one in here, but I wasn't' sure of what to do. This is a song I wrote about a year or so ago. Hope you all like it. Secondly, I always thought that Rachel singing 'Loser Like Me' was wrong. She had nothing to do with writing it and yet she still managed to get the solo. I know I like to bash Finchel. I really don't like them, and I hate that they get to be center stage all the time. So I think that splitting the song between all the people who did help to write was the logical thing to do. Plus I think it would sound amazing if they sang it like that.

And lastly as I have said before, this is only going to be the first part. The next part will take place during the summer and the third will be their senior year. I have a lot of plans for the whole thing, just have to hang in there with me.


	12. Chapter 12: Listen with your Heart

Chapter 12: Listen with Your Heart

After regionals things have been going good for me. I have managed to stay out of the line of fire from the football team, things in with the New Directions are running smoothly, and I have been talking with Guest64 daily.

I am not sure how I managed it, but I think I have gotten to know where the spots the football team likes to be at. So now I know where to avoid. Rachel has taken a few more recently, but Finn has been there to help her. After the song she wrote, that was obviously directed at him, he has been doting on her constantly. She loves it, and the rest of us could really care less. They just better keep it together. Now we have Nationals to thing about!

And with Nationals only two months away, we took a week off, but now it is back to the grind stone. We need to figure out what we are going to do. Original songs seem like the obvious choice, but we haven't been able to come up with anything yet. But I am sure that we will figure something out.

Things with Guest64 have been great! We are texting each other every day. I feel like I know him so well, yet he still remains somewhat of a mystery to me. He won't tell me his name, and he keeps telling me that he isn't ready to meet just yet. I am trying to be patient, but this whole talking through typed out words is getting a little depressing. I like the connection you can make with a person while sitting over coffee or even just walking around. Over the phone or computer just seems so impersonal to me.

It is during one of our many discussions about our favorite cars, (And yes, I do know quite a bit on the subject. My father does run an auto repair shop after all.) that I hear that Mr. Schue wants us to sell taffy to raise money for Nationals. Now I am all for trying to raise money, but our bake sale last year didn't really go so well, so I don't know how he expects us to push taffy. There are many groans and complaints from around the room. Then Mike stands up and tells us all about the Brainiacs and how they can't even go to their finals. He then goes on to tell us that he thinks that we are selfish, which in reality it true. I do remember them telling us about their club, but I was too focused on myself and other things that I didn't even care.

So Mr. Schue adds the costs for their trip onto what we need to sell for Nationals. I am pretty sure that this won't work, but I guess that I am willing to give it a try.

* * *

><p>The next day Mr. Schue comes back saying that he has a new idea of how we can raise money. That we can put on a concert of sorts, a Night of Neglect. We will choose artists who don't get the spotlight like they should. This actually sounds like a good idea. My head is already going over who I want to sing.<p>

In the hallway later, Tina is telling us that she is going to sing a song by Lykke Li. Mike wants to do a big dance number, and Mercedes wants to do an Aretha Franklin song, because we haven't sung any of her songs in Glee yet. Then Rachel comes out of nowhere saying that she is going to sing My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion. We all give her a really look. She goes on to say that she is honoring herself as the neglected artist. But that just makes me angry.

"Why are you a neglected artist?"

"You guys never take me seriously, and I am not given the respect that is truly deserve."

"Well maybe the reason you aren't taken seriously is because you are a complete joke." She gasps at my outburst, "Well, you act like you are better than the rest of us. I thought we had this conversation back at sectionals? You weren't given a solo then because there is a lot of talent within our small group. You had a solo at regionals not even two weeks ago. You never let us forget that it was your idea to do original songs. And I bet that with this whole concert thing, you thought that you could just come in a take the final performance."

"Well, it should go to the most talented of us all."

"At this moment I don't think that, that is you." She gasps even bigger this time, "That's right. You are too much of a diva, and not in the way a true diva should be. You expect everything to be given to you without earning it. If anyone should get the final performance, I think that it should be Mercedes."

Rachel is the reddest I have ever seen her at this point. She opens her mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. She grasps at words for a few moments, but still nothing comes. She composes herself as best she can, then turns and walks away with her head held as high as it possibly can be. After she turns the corner, the small group of us that were standing there all start to laugh.

"I cannot believe that you just said all of that to her face!"

"Well Tina, I would never say something behind someone's back that I wouldn't be willing to say to their face. And she needed to hear it, but judging from the way she walked away, none of what I said meant anything to her; which is really sad."

"Did you mean what you said about me deserving the last spot?"

"Yes I did. You may not have had chances to shine in the last few weeks, but you never act like her. I think that is one quality that is worthy of a true Diva. You have let others take the spotlight and not begrudged them. If anything, you are the neglected artist here."

"Thanks Kurt."

"Anytime"

Then Finn comes up to us and says that Sunshine is here and wants to talk to us. We all head to the Auditorium to see what she has to say.

…

In the end all she wants to do is help us. Rachel acts like it is a crime against Gaga, and tries to completely refuse her help, but we all know that we would never be able to fill all the seats like she could. And she does promise to fill them. We all remind Rachel of how she was the one at fault, yet again, because she is the one who sent Sunshine to a crack house. In the end we all agree that she should be there and welcome her help.

Then Rachel comes over to Mercedes and says that she hopes she is happy with the middle spot because that is where she will be moved to. I am about to start in on her for the second time that day when Mercedes holds a hand up to me and then turns to Rachel. "What Kurt said earlier is true Rachel. You think that you are the one who is neglected, but really, you are the one who gets the spotlight the most. So I am finally standing my ground this time. YOU are the one who is going to take the middle slot and I am going to go right before Sunshine. I don't mind going before her, because she is the one who is going to help our friends, and not you. You only care about yourself, so you can take care of you, and be happy that you are even getting a chance to sing at all." Rachel storms off with Finn right on her heels, and as they leave we all laugh and congratulate Mercedes for sticking up for herself. Hopefully she takes a hint this time.

* * *

><p>After school is over I am venting about my day to 64.<p>

**To Guest64: The nerve she has to try and demand the things she does, well it just boils my blood.**

**Guest64: She doesn't seem like a very nice person**

**To Guest64: She isn't! I mean I can be selfish too, who can't? But she takes it to a whole new level! This isn't Rachel and the New Directions! We are a club as a whole.**

**Guest64: Well I think you just have to remember that this is how people are. People in the entertainment industry are like that a lot. She will fit in perfectly.**

**To Guest64: True but I don't have to like it.**

**Guest64: No you don't, just get used to it. You do want to go to Broadway right?**

**To Guest64: Yes I do! I know you are right. It is just so frustrating. **

**Guest64: So why did all of this come up anyway?**

**To Guest64: OH! Well our club is doing this concert that we are calling the Night of Neglect. We are all going to sing songs by artists that don't always get the praise that they deserve. That is the way we feel, well from our school anyway.**

**Guest64: Sounds like it will be interesting! You singing?**

**To Guest64: Yes I am, and I hope it will be. Would you like to come?**

**Guest64: Yeah I would! After the way you guys performed at your last competition I know it will be amazing!**

**To Guest64: Okay! I will get you the information! Thanks for all the support! I feel like I just go on and on about myself. How are you doing?**

**Guest64: It's okay. I am doin good. Just getting by. My grades are back up, I have been working out, and lost a bunch of weight too! But my friends don't really get what is going on with me. I haven't been hanging out with them, but I am not sure that I want to anymore. They are still acting the way I used to and I don't want to be that guy again. **

**To Guest64: Well, just be yourself. If they don't like you for you, then they weren't really your friends to begin with. Plus you still have me.**

**Guest64: Thanks. I know that I have been hesitant to meet up. I just want to make be 100% comfortable in my own skin before we do meet. **

**To Guest64: I can respect that. But is it selfish of me to hope that it does happen soon? **

**Guest64: Not at all. I would like that too.**

Our conversation slowly winds down after that, and I feel good again. He always knows just what to say to make me feel better.

* * *

><p>Before we know it, the concert night is upon us and we are all buzzing around trying to get ready. All of our parents and family are out there, and a few other faces. Some of which we know and others that we don't. But it doesn't look like Sunshine's 600 followers are here. Then Santana gets a Twitter update from Sunshine saying that she can't come because her Director won't let her. So with that our spirits are down somewhat but as they say in show business, the show must go on.<p>

…

When Tina comes back in tears because of the 'heckling' club, we all get really mad, after Mike comes back though, he says that all of our families shut them up and that the rest of us should be able to perform in peace.

Before I know it, I am up. I really didn't care about my spot on the list because we did use my song for regionals, and this whole concert idea has just been too much fun. I step out on to the stage, knowing that 64 is there and my dad with Carol. I can't really see anyone because of the spotlight, but I thought I saw David sitting there. Maybe he was one of the hecklers? But I am not sure the only thing I do know is that everything is going to turn out just fine.

When you can't find your way through the night  
>When you've lost touch and nothings feeling right<br>You can't find that path that leads you on  
>And you don't know which road to choose<br>That's when you've got to

Listen with your heart  
>Listen to your soul<br>Inside you'll find the answer  
>The place you need to go<p>

Listen with your heart  
>Your heart will let you know<br>No matter where you are  
>Just listen and your heart will lead you home<p>

And when this world has got your mind confused  
>And when your faith has gone and run out on you<br>You can't find that faith in your soul  
>You don't know which road to choose<br>That's when you've got to

Listen with your heart  
>Listen to your soul<br>Inside you'll find the answer  
>The place you need to go<p>

Listen with your heart  
>Your heart will let you know<br>No matter where you are  
>The truth is never far<br>Just listen and your heart will lead you home

We all lose our way sometimes  
>we all lose our faith sometimes<br>If you just believe and just be strong your heart will take you home

Listen with your heart  
>Listen to your soul<br>Inside you'll find the answer  
>The place you need to go<p>

Listen with your heart  
>Your heart will let you know<br>No matter where you are  
>The truth is never far<br>Just listen and your heart will lead you home

The truth is never far  
>Just listen and your heart will lead you home<p>

The applause is amazing. Something I think I could never get tired of. The rest of the show goes amazingly, and Mercedes finishes the night with one of her best performances. Sandy Ryerson was one of the people heckling, but after Mercedes performance came up to Mr. Schue and offered more money to us saying that he loves Aretha, and that it was his only weakness. So not only are the Brainiacs going to their finals, but we are completely funded to go to Nationals!

* * *

><p>The song is Listen with your heart by Casey Donovan<p>

A/n: Sorry for not updating in a while. As some of you might have seen, I am currently working on a new story. One that is made up entirely of OC's. The story is just starting and I can't wait to see where those characters take me. I haven't forgotten about this story, but my real life has become a war zone of sorts. I have so much going on that I don't really know which way is up anymore. I will try to update this more regularly though. Things are starting to pick up a little bit! Tell me what you think!


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